Kakak Anyok Punya Cerita

Building me? After six months??

2011-07-08T00:47:00.002+08:00

Whoa~! It's been a while i did not update my blog. Not a while.. It's a long long time. I chose not to update. Don't know why. Guess feeling lazy to write down the 'dramas'. Haha. Six months not updating blog??~! Am I insane?? Padahal i always online. Well. Life in the univeristy is very very hectic IF we are good in choosing the right path.

Busy with school life,personal life,self experiencing. Many things happened. Many many. I actually don't know where to start. Okay. Let me start with my achievements. I managed to improve my GPA and got a B for my Mandarin. Kinda a good result for a beginner like me. I became Protocol Leader in my Curriculum activity, Motivational Camp at Kudat. It was the best 3 days 2 nights experience i ever had! Conflicts between roommates and housemates, a great drama ever i created. When i think about it, I was so proud at myself. Hehe. Proud of letting go the feeling.Spur it out,baby. In conclusion, my campus life for second sem in my first year was about building who am i. Getting to know myself. What i want in my life,exactly (still searching).

I always in dilemma. All the times. Even now.. I am thinking. To ease all of these.. I have a new obsession, it is a game. A Facebook game, CityVille. I am so in LOVE with that game. HAHA..

I guess, that's all for now. I will update all the time Toodles..

short drama

2010-12-01T01:51:00.004+08:00

Here i am in my hometown. Happy i am indescribable. Am i that happy? Indeed i am. I came across of these words of mine while i was cooking dinner. These are the words or in a simple language,QUESTION, " If I need to choose between a married man or different religion man, what will be the choice?" The question I left no answer. Thinking.. What were i thinking?

If I am a wise person or maybe a mature young lady, do not choose then. Risk them all. How easy will that be? It depends.

My life in Kota Kinabalu is the greatest experience ever! Living alone without family by my side taught be to be stronger each day. In fact, i do not cry like what some of my friends did. Homesick is a common thing but mine was not that critical. What more can i say, i love being far away from Kuching. Not saying that the freedom that i had was the main objective here. It is just that the feeling being independent. I wish my parents could see how i manage my daily routine full of craziness. I am proudly to tell myself that, I am a independent girl. :)

The difficult part was.. I am craving my hometown food,my mum;s cook and my own! Haha.. That's the only problem that i need to deal with,till now. I am going to spend my semester break for a month plus. Better spend it wisely my dear Antonia. Eat as much as i can. And at the same time, my heart beats fast whenever i think of my result.. Gosh!

Let me tell you my first time experience had FINALS in UMS. Gosh! It was a very shocking moment whereby I did not feel the 'kick' of having FINALS. I was the one who forced myself to sit and stuck my eyes on the book. Kononnya. HAHA! I had the fear BUT I was not so sure with that feelings of mine. I was in mix. So, I am going to face all the consequences that I made. My mistakes babe. Like what my mom told me. " It's your first time" Yah. My hope tidak setinggi gunung Kinabalu.. Yikes!

Therefore, worry less bout the result. Worry more on my weight. I guess I am gaining some weight and I should lose some in order to get the sexy back! Need some help here. My tummy is worrying me. She is so in trouble.

Bah,Boleh bah kalau kau... :) I am going to do some workout. Might be my old routine. All the best!!!

The lover of my life is always be in my mind. Thinking of him each day make the grey sky turn to blue. He has everything that I want. Not everything. So, i love him! :)

2010-11-17T17:02:00.002+08:00

My life is like cotton candy or candy floss. Talking to the moon.

Inilah cinta

2010-09-11T14:08:00.002+08:00

Lagu caller ringtone sayang :)

Exactly!!!

Terpegun ku melihat kamu

Bergetar hatiku memandang mu

Dan terus datang mencuba

Adakah khayalku menjadi nyata

Oh resah hati gelisah

Ku takut tak diterima

Rupanya kau juga sama

Seperti aku merasa cinta

Chorus

Mungkin inikah yang dinamakan cinta

Hati gembira rasa bila kau kata cinta

Siang yang suram kini menjadi ceria

Hati yang gelisah akhirnya kini menjadi bahagia

Oh resah hati gelisah

Ku takut tak diterima

Rupanya kau juga sama

Seperti aku yang merasakan cinta

Ulang Chorus

Sungguh susahnya aku mendekati mu

Mengambil kesempatan untuk tunjukkan cintaku

Rasa bahagia bila kau menerimaku

Indah semuanya hilang semua resahku

Kita berdua kini menjalin cinta

Inilah cinta kita

Akhirnya kini menjadi bahagia

Inilah cintaku

Inilah sayangku

Inilah cinta

NINI ANT

2010-09-07T21:37:00.002+08:00

Semangat aku hendak ke pulang ke tempat lahir aku, Kuching Sarawak sangat sangat tidak dapat aku bayangkan. Makan tak lalu..tidur tak lena. Pada 6 September, sahabat baik aku Nini menjemput aku di Kampung E UMS dengan menggunakan teksi berwarna biru putih. Apek teksi sungguh peramah. lega hati aku. Perjalanan ke lapangan terbang KK,Terminal 2 membawa erti yang bermakna. Bukan aku meninggalkan KK buat selama-lamanya.. Hanya untuk beberapa hari saja. Hehe.. Cuti raya. Cuti ini akan aku untuk akan dengan sebaik-baiknya.

Perasaan tak sabar hendak pulang ke Kuching untuk berjumpa dengan seseorang tidak dapat aku gambarkan.

Pengalaman bermalam di airpot sungguh menyeronokan apabila bersama dengan sahabat baik aku, Nini. sudah lebih dua bulan tidak berjumpa,banyak benda yang kami bualkan sehinggakan air mata menjadi peneman kami.

Selepas mengalas perut di KFC,kami berdua mencari tempat untuk menonton drama bersiri popular TV3,AdaMaya ;)

Kami berdua penuh perasaan. Nini tidka tidur kerana terlalu obses dengan drama ini. Aku, hanya menemani Nini. Ini disebabkan aku sudah menonton drama ini beberapa kali di bilik aku bersama dengan Anis dan Lia.

Out of no where, kami berjumpa dengan uncle and aunty kantin sekolah menengah kami dulu. Masih juga aunty itu ingat wajah aku. Nini sukar dikenalpasti kerana di sekolah dulu,Nini bertudung.. jadi..agak sukar untuk orang detect. Haha!

7September

Masa yang ditunggu-tunggu kami berdua. PULANG KE KUCHING!!!! Perasaan kami pada saat itu sangat-sangat lah bahagia. Hanya senyuman yang mampu kami ukirkan di wajah.

Aku dapat berjumpa dengan buah hati aku! Hehe!! My family of coz!

So.. Hap[y Holiday!!!

Anton & Lia

2010-09-01T16:09:00.003+08:00

Antonia berada di UMS selama dua bulan lebih. Ini bererti dia sudah jauh daripada keluarga,besties,sayang selama dua bulan. Antonia belum lagi menitiskan air mata sebanyak satu baldi sebab homesick. Antonia berjiwa kental. Antonia buat bodoh. Setiap petang hari Jumaat selepas kuliah Akaun, Antonia dan kawan rapatnya dari Kuching, Sarawak juga,Lia pasti berada di Bayu Cafe. Di sana mereka berdua melihat matahari terbenam dari kerusi malas kayu dan melihat pulau seberang Bayu Kafe. Sesi dialog bermula.

" Sulu, cubalah Kuching seberang ya jak," kata Lia kepada Ant.

" Aok ar. Ulih la tua kin tiap ari. Bisi d meda Wisma Saberkas,the Spring?" jawab Ant.

" HAHA!!!"

Translation:

" Sayang,cubalah Kuching seberang tu ja," kata Lia kepada Ant.

" Yala. Boleh kita ke sana setiap hari. Ada kau tengok Wisma Saberkas, the Spring?" jawab Ant.

Antonia dan Lia ketawa terbahak-bahak sehinggakan abang yang tengah menggoreng mee menoleh dengan renungan yang penuh misteri. Takut agaknya dia melihat mereka berdua ketawa sedemikian kerana seperti dirasuk. Ops!

Berbual punya berbual tidak sedar dan masa terlalu mencemburi mereka berdua. Jam 7 malam rupanya. Lia dan Antonia berjalan ke arah bus stop yang bertentangan dengan Sekolah Seni. Di sana Lia ditinggalkan kerana Lia tinggal di Kampung CD dan Antonia tinggal di Kampung E.

Terasa dekat dengan Kuching apabila berkelaka dengan si Lia.

ANT's epic

2010-07-11T09:24:00.003+08:00

2 July 2010

Bye bye Kuching. Hello hello KK. At airport,our uncle sent the whole family to airport. Heard his advice the whole way. My sayang came to airport to meet me before i went off. It was the hardest feeling that i ever had. Leaving him and Kuching. But i must do so as i really wanted to enter Uni. Sad sad. before enter the plane,he kissed me. Met C.Dior and she gave me cheese cake! Im loving it! Thanks babe!

Arrived at KK around 2pm. The weather was HUMID! and the feeling that i had as soon as i reached at KK was " IM IN INDONESIA".. Haha!!! We stayed at Imperial Hotel at the KK centre. Letak our bag and off we went to shopping. Kita shopping until night. I had fun with my family and my love,Nuraini. She followed us by the way ;)

Many things happened that day. I was so so happy.

3 July 2010

The hari pendaftaran kolej kediaman kampung E. UMS is HUGE so do my kampung E. Besar and cantik dan terindah. Nuraini and I were so excited so do my family. The pendaftaran moment was so so hectic. Banyak rintangan that we went through. Finaly,things went smoothly.

The rest of the orientation week started on the 4th-10th July. Many things happened.

The great part was,i had an adventure went to pasar KK with Nuraini! We naik bus TUT...haha!!! tambang balik dan pulang RM3/person.

Now,Nini at Labuan...kolej dia kat Labuan. Huhu!!! Berpisah lah kami berdua. It is OK. ;) we will meet again.

Now, i feel home sick. Sangat sangat home sick. Huhu!!! Hendak menangis pun no air mata. Haha!!! I really miss my family,KUCHING SARAWAK , the KAMEK KITAK language and my sayang of coz! and my girls...Ernie especially. ;(

I'll update soon. Kuliah starts tomorrow. all the best to me to search the bilik kuliah...tak boleh sesat and lambat! ;P

see ya soon!

bila hati ini mulai.....

2010-07-01T08:10:00.002+08:00

Yesterday i spent my whole day with him. We were so sad. Tried to hold back the tears,managed to. Im going to Sabah tomorrow. It is so sad to leave your love ones and all the memories behind. But life must go on. I am so sad to leave my sayanng alone at Kuching but bak kata Nini to me this morning "Sikpa. Percaturan dunia. Perkara biasa tinggal meninggal. Ketetapan hati yang penting bah," Huhu!!! Yah! I do agree on that. Sangat-sangat agree. My friends,i love you all. And my sayang, lak sayang suruh penyu hantar surat cinta... Hahahaha!!! ;P

senangnya dalam HATI

2010-06-30T07:36:00.002+08:00

Segala urusan sudah selesai. Hari ini aku ingin rehat sepuas-puasnya. Penat aku beberapa hari yang lalu. Terlampau sibuk menguruskan segala macam hal untuk ke Uni. Last week aku sibuk membeli pakaian,barang keperluan yang minima dan akan membeli di Kota Kinabalu nanti. Berurusan dengan pejabat JPN,bank,pihak sekolah,pos office sungguh menyeksa jiwa TETAPI telah menngajar aku untuk menjadi seorang yang TABAH dan TAHU mengurus segala urusan rasmi tanpa sebarang bantuan daripada ibu bapa. Saja hendak menyusahkan diri agar tidak kelihatan bodoh di kelak hari. Banyak peristiwa berlaku. Sungguh seronok melakukan urusan rasmi bersama dengan teman-teman baik. Di sana kita dapat melihat kesetiaan dan kesanggupan seorang teman semasa susah dan senang kita. Moga segala impian dan cita-cita kami akan tercapai. Jumaat ini akan aku terbang ke Sabah untuk membuka lebaran baru sebagai seorang mahasiswi. Aku berharap aku tidak akan menghampakan orang di Kuching. Akan aku belajar sungguh-sungguh kerana untuk melewati peringkat ini aku melalui pelbagai rintangan dan cabaran. Setiap perjalanan hidup aku sebagai pelajar sekolah menengah rendah,atas memberi kesan yang mendalam. Indahnya perasaan ini apabila mengetahui aku berjaya masuk ke IPTA. :)

muach!

2010-06-28T23:13:00.001+08:00

Okay. I had intresting story nak share. sangat sangat banyak. duno where to mulakan. First of all,aku dapat tawaran masuk U di UMS,Kota Konabalu dalam bidang Ekonomi Pembangunan dan Perancangan. Happy sangat sangat coz i managed to enter U. All the work hard paid off! :) Untuk menguruskan kemasukan IPTA ini sangat sangat susah. Without any guidance, i went to seacrh it by myself. I membuat sedikit penyelidikan of coz with the girls. urus sorang sorang. My parents ada buat juga la... Sangat sangat sibuk and very very tired. HumpH! Apa yang penting, the girls and i had so much great time together sebelum berpisah ke Uni masing-masing. All the best. Out future is in our own hand. :) Later,soon...i'll be updating this blog of mine!!! ;)

...Never get to choose...

2010-06-17T22:40:00.001+08:00

I had great time with my sayang today. Always do. (:

kesan crita Ernie

2010-06-16T20:45:00.001+08:00

Aku sangat sangat tersentuh dengan 'post' yang dikarang oleh Ernie. Sungguh sedih aku. Bukan apa...Rumah itu banyak memberi kenangan kepada kami semua. Sungguh tidak dapat aku lewat ke rumah itu. Setiap kali aku lewat ke rumah itu,hati aku menjadi sayu. Teringat hilai ketawa aku,tangis....semua perasaan ada. Sedihhhh.....

kesah aku dan Baby

2010-06-14T11:41:00.003+08:00

Kesah ini adalah kesah benar. PAda hari Sabtu yang lalu,12 Jun 2010,aku dan kazen-kazen aku yang lain dijemput oleh Aunty Joan dan Buju Clement untuk ke wedding adik Aunty Joan iaitu,Uncle Ben di Kampung Sebat,Sematan. Perjalanan kami bermula pada jam 2 petang. Dalam kancil merah,aku,Larry,Elik dan Baby sungguh excited hendak ke Sematan. Agaknya,sudah bosan terkurung dalam rumah beberapa minggu. HAHA!! Kazen aku yang baru berumah tangga,Lyn bersama suaminya,Augustine ikut dari belakang kereta kami.

Perjalanan ke Sematan sungguh lama.Burit kami agak kebas duduk. Larry menjadi si Pemandu. Aku dan Baby sibuk berbual. Kami bermain di dalam kereta. Banyak game kami. Contohnya,mengacau pemandu lain.Hahaha!! Sungguh bosan sepanjang perjalanan tetapi dengan adanya Baby di sisiku,aku tidak mudah boring. (:

Setibanya di Kampung Sebat,kami terus berjumpa dengan Buju Clement untuk mengambil kunci bilik hotel kami. Buju sponsor bilik u know! Haha!! Hepi2...Pelamin sudah siap. Pentas untuk live band sudah ada. Sungguh chantek segala persiapan yang telah dilakukan oleh keluarga Aunty Joan dan penduduk Kampung Sebat. Bravo!

Kami terus ke Hotel Sematan. Sungguh unik hotel ini. Tidak aku sanggup mengelarnya hotel. Bak kata Baby,Motel 5 bintang. Hehe!!! Aku dan Baby berkongsi bilik. Elik dan Larry. Lyn dengan suaminya,Augustine. Aku dan Baby ketawa apabila masuk ke dalam bilik. Bilik ini sungguh cantik. Hehe!!!

Selepas berkemas,kami terus ke Kampung Sebat untuk menghadiri majlis perkahwinan Uncle Ben dan isterinya. Sungguh meriah. Kami disambut dengan mesra oleh penduduk Kampung Sebat dengan air tuak. Haha!!! Aku minum bagi wakil Larry dan Baby. Sesi makan malam bermula. Kami makan sehingga kenyang. Tidak perlu segan. Makan saja!!! Hahahaha!!!!

Sesi joget yang kami tunggu-tunggu telah tiba. Memang aku dan Baby berjoget sehingga peluh kami keluar. Poco-poco sudah semestinya! haha!!! sungguh meriah malam itu. Kami balik tepat jam 12 tengah malam. Balik la kami ke hotel. Jarak dari kampung ke hotel memakan masa selama 15 minit. Itupun kalau drive dengan laju lah! haha!!!

Setiba di hotel,perut aku yang kiut memulas. Oh Tidak! Aku pergi la ke dalam tandas yang agak sempit itu. Setelah selesai,aku cuci lah apa yang patut. Haha!!! Selepas itu,aku cuci kaki kerana hendak tidur. Tiba-tiba,aku ternampak satu objek berwarna cokelat yang melompat-lompat! Oh tidak!!! Kodok dalam jamban!!! Aku jerit,terus keluar. Baby,kazen aku blurr seketika. Aku memberitahunya aku terjumpa kodok. Beliau tidak mempercayai aku.Aku dalam ketakutan. Akhirnya,beliau mempercayai aku. Beliau lebih takut daripada aku. Kami takut sangat2. Tidak dapat tidur lena malam itu. Hahaha!!!

agaknya,kodok itu merupakan Prince Charming Baby nak??? Hahhaa!!!!!

Adohh..Lawak eyh...Gelik pun ada. Aiyyerr!!!

Aku tak sukda kodok.

kamek & kitak

2010-06-12T09:23:00.002+08:00

Kenapa wajah aku begitu bersinar? Haha.!!!!

Gambar ini saya dedikasikan kepada Faizah,Ernie,Nini (: Haha!!!

Kau yang bernama CINTA

2010-06-11T22:26:00.004+08:00

Pada masa aku menyedari sepasang mata memerhatikan aku,aku sedar balasan kepada pandangan mata aku mampu membuatkan hati dia cair seperti mentega yang sedang dicairkan di atas kuali leper. Aku pada ketika itu tidak punya perasaan apa-apa kerana hati ini pernah dilukai. Aku takut untuk merasakan perasaan yang baru. Luka di hati ini belum sembuh sepenuhnya. Daripada pandangan matanya itu, hati kecil aku terdetik bahawa dia punya perasaan terhadap aku. Hanya aku yang mengelak segala perasaan itu. Ini disebabkan luka dan sejarah lama aku.

Aku jalani rutin harian aku dengan penuh harapan agar tidak akan jatuh cinta lagi. Bukan pada masa terdekat ini. Aku sering berdoa agar Tuhan jauhkan perasaan cinta dan sayang itu daripada aku buat masa itu. Nyata,perasaan itu muncul dan terdetik lebih awal. Aku belum sedia untuk menerimanya.

Saat perbualan pertama kami,kami mampu memberi senyuman yang lebar selebarnya. =)

Hati yang luka mampu berbunga. Oh,indahnya perasaan ini. Aku punyai pilihan. Samada untuk lari atau kenal dia dengan lebih dekat. Jadi,aku memilih untuk mengenali dia dengan lebih dekat.Entah mengapa aku bertindak sedemikian. Ini mungkin disebabkan cinta pandangan pertama? *sigh sigh*

Persahabatan mulai terjalin dengan makan tengah hari,makan malam bersama,lepak bersama,berkongsi cerita dan pengalaman. Suka dan duka dirasa bersama sehingga warna kami berdua sebenarnya muncul. Dengan menerima kelemahan dan kekurangan sesorang itu menjadikan persahabatan kami semakin erat. Akhirnya dia memutuskan untuk menjadikan aku sebagai teman rapat/istimewa a.k.a GEREKnya. Aku memberi jawapan yang cukup ringkas. Terlampau ringkas sehingga menyebabkan dia tidak mudah memahami. Jawapan aku itu ialah,

" Kenak cepat gilak?" Maksudnya,kenapa cepat sangat??

Dia agak terkejut tetapi reaksi dia terhadap jawapan aku sungguh meruntun jiwa. Dia menjawab dengan tenang bahawa dia menghormati keputusan aku. Bukan aku hendak memuji. Ini adalah pertama kali seorang lelaki betul-betul menghormati kehendak dan keputusan aku. Sepanjang tempoh 'kenal hati budi masing-masing',terus-terang aku katakan TIDAK PERNAH seorang lelaki yang benar-benar melihat mata aku ini dengan penuh perasaan. Dia melihat aku seperti dia benar-benar punya perasaan ikhlas terhadap aku. Bukan aku hendak berjiwang di sini tetapi ini adalah kenyataan. Maaf sekiranya konten blog aku pada masa ini terlampau jiwang. Hehehe!!! (:

Tidak pernah walau seorang pun bekas kekasihku yang lain tidak pernah memberi pandangan yang betul-betul ikhlas. Aku betul-betul merasainya. Beberapa kali aku menafikan,hati aku tetap mengiyakannya. Cara dia melihat aku seperti dia betul-betul jatuh cinta dengan aku. Ini pengertian aku lah.Haha!! Sungguh jujur perasaan kitak pada masa ya ngan kamek.

Hubungan kami berdua diuji dari segi 'understanding each other'. Aku belajar untuk menyesuaikan diri dengan keadaannya yang sungguh baru bagi aku. Vice versa.

Setiap kali bertemu,mata dan bibir sentiasa tersenyum. Gelak ketawa selalu kedengaran. Banyak kenangan yang kami lalui. Hati ini mulai jatuh cinta. Apakah ini perasaan jatuh cinta? Tidak dapat aku nafikan perasaan ini. Terlalu dalam. Aku menjadi diri aku apabila bersamanya. Sungguh selesa di sampingnya. Tiada siapa yang dapat memberi pandangan sebegitu kepada aku. Hanya dia,dildil aku yang mampu.

Dia tidak seperti lelaki lain yang pernah aku temui,setakat ini. Dia lain daripada yang lain.

the movie that i wanted to watch!

2010-06-08T03:41:00.002+08:00

aku diTAG oleh Pezah! (:

2010-06-07T14:48:00.002+08:00

Adakah anda happy skang?

tidak juga la rasa happy itu .....

kenapa anda hepi?

sik aku hapy lahh...haha!!!

Apakah bnda yg boleh buatkan anda hepi?

kebebasan yang ingin dikecapi dan bersama orang yang kita sayang lah (:

Pernahkah anda menerima tag?

of coz! (:

Nyatakan warna yg anda suka?
saya suka warna yang cerah... (;

Beritahu 9 org yg anda mahu tag

tak perlu la nak tag org..hahaa!!!! ;p

Tulis sesuatu tentang orang yg anda tag. tulis berjela pon xper.

aku takde manusia nak ditag jadi buat apa nak tulis sstu ttg mereka??? hahhhaa!!! sungguh tidak bernas,,,waseh!

Adakah anda happy dengan apa yang anda ada skang?

saya syukur dengan apa yang aku ada buat masa ini. (:

betapa gembira hatiku

2010-05-31T14:52:00.003+08:00

Aku sungguh gembira kerana berat badan aku turun sebanyak empat kilogram..hehe! saiz seluar pun turun dari 30/32 inchi ke 28 inchi..hehe!! Sungguh bahagia...Rahsia kepada segala-galanya ialah usapkan losyen pati halia Yusmira/Mustajab ke perut dan bahagian paha,buntot..dan pakailah GIRDLE. Pakaikan sehari-harian dan selalu untuk menampakan hasil yang HEBAT!! (:

Tips satu lagi. Jangan makan malam selepas jam 8 dan kurangkan nasi serta banyakan minum air putih. Amalkan selalu. Sudah tiga bulan amalkan,ada membuahkan hasil. Sekarang,aku hanya nak maintain jer. Selamat mencuba!

esok sudah Gawai,maka.... Diet aku kena WATCHOUT! (;

Sapa pembina kilang gula??

2010-05-30T16:25:00.004+08:00

Lagu Hetty Koesendang,Syurga dan Neraka memang best! Daku suka akan seni kata lagu tersebut. Hehe!!! Soal cinta you know,Faizah. (:

Aku hari ini menemani ibu aku yang terchenta ke salun kegemaran kami berdua di TABUAN JAYA,SUMMER DREAM. Ibu aku ingin mewarnakan rambut nya ke warna DARK BROWN. Hehe!!!! Sungguh lama aku duduk di kerusi yang disediakan. Aku terbaca ayat yang terdapat dalam majalah berbahasa Inggeris ini.

Ayat ini betul-betul menyentuh jiwa aku yang pernah dipermainkan oleh seorang playboy yang sungguh terkenal di Nusantara ini. Sungguh kejam. Ayat-ayat ini seperti pernah aku sampaikan kepada seosrang tetapi aku tidak tahu siapa. Barangkali orang yang tidak rapat dengan aku agaknya.

"Maybe she thinks she can tame him, but he will never change"

Sungguh benar ayat-ayat ini. Bukan tanam tebu di tepi bibir lagi itu. BINA kilang gula di tepi bibir.Ish ish.....what comes around goes around. Apa yang penting,aku bahagia di sisi seorang lelaki yang betul-betul menghargai aku. Diharapakan apa yang telah berlaku akan menjadi pedoman hidup. (:

Anak Humu & anak Baba

2010-05-20T16:03:00.003+08:00

Pada suatu hari seorang puteri yang bernama Puteri Loli bermain di Taman Sahabat. Puteri Loli suka memberi ikan makanan ikan yang ditempah khas dari Paris. Ini sedikit sebanyak info Puteri Loli.

Ayahanda Puteri Loli,Raja Baba mempunyai harta yang banyak. Sangat banyak sehinggakan Raja Baba buntu untuk menghabiskan harta baginda. Puteri Loli merupakan anak tunggal kepada Raja Baba dan Permaisuri Zaza. Permaisuri Zaza merupaka permaisuri yang sangat baik hati tetapi garang. Baginda tidak pernah menunjukkan kasih sayang kepada Puteri Loli. Baginda baik hati kerana baginda sering membeli barang yang mahal-mahal serta berjenama kepada anakanda baginda,Loli.

Puteri Loli sedang memberi makan kepada ikan emas di kolam Taman Sahabat sambil menyanyikan lagu yang tengah hits pada zaman itu,Dan Sebenarnya. Nyanyi punya nyanyi tiba-tiba dahi baginda dihingapi oleh seekor nyamuk. Dayang-dayang tuan puteri pada saat itu sedang menikmati ais krim bun dan tidak menghiraukan tuan puteri.

" Alamak! Nyamuk la kat dahi mek tok!" kata Loli dalam hati.

Nyamuk pun dengan selambanya menghisap darah penuh syoknya. Tiba-tiba konsentrasi sang nyamuk itu terganggu apabila kaki nyamuk itu terpijak satu ketulan yang keras pada permukaan dahi tuan Puteri Loli. Ketulan keras itu ialah JERAWAT!!! Bukan sebarang jerawat,jerawat batu namanya! Hampir pengsan si nyamuk itu pabila mengetahui dia hampir menghisap di salah kawasan.

"Arh! Biar jak lah nyamuk ya isap darah dahi mek.Sikda mok lalek gilak," kata Puteri Loli.

"Tuan Puteriiiiiiiiiiiiiiii.....!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" jerit ketua dayang,Faizah.

"Kenak Faizah?" tanya Loli.

"Kenak sik bunuh jak nyamuk ya??"

" Sik mok mek. Tandah jak sia. Sian nya eyh. Lapar kali,"

"Apa mok dikesian ngan nyamuk ya. Aduh...Lak gatal dahi kitak,tuan puteri,"

Nyamuk yang berada di dahi Puteri Loli berasa serba salah lalu terbang dengan selambanya. Sedang nyamuk itu berterbangan,dia terjumpa dengan kawannya di langit biru,burung.

"Rung! Kau dari cney tek??"

" Dari London aku. Aku mok g Taman Sahabat. Mok cari kekasih baru. Di London nun dah puas aku,"

" Mena crita ko tok? haha! Dasar playboy juak ko Rung,"

"Well..you know me Muk,"

Ketawa mereka kedengaran oleh sang Katak yang sungguh unik. Katak ini punya sayap dan bisa terbang seperti Burung dan Nyamuk.

" Atak! Kenak ko ada sayap? Maka katak neyda sayap?" tanya Burung penuh sinis.

" Aku tok disumpah sebenarnya Rung. Aku dolok putera di Negeri Samarahan. Aku Putera Dana," Jawab Katak dengan penuh yakin.

" Bulak eyh! Sikda aku cayak. Mun benar lah kau tok Putera,kenak kau leh kena sumpah?" tanya Nyamuk dengan nada yang serius.

" Macam tok critanya. Bapak aku,Raja Humu gila harta akan Raja Baba. Nya nyuruh aku pegi bunuh bini Raja Baba,Permaisuri Zaza.Aku sik sanggup sebab aku sayang anak daknya,Puteri Loli. Ya bapak aku manas alu sumpah aku jadi katak. Kali magic spell nya salah. Yala ada sayap. Kedak kisah Si Tanggang lah crita aku tok," cerita Katak penuh perasaan.

" Oohhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!" kata Nyamuk dan Burung.

Puteri Loli sedang berbual dengan dayang-dayangnya apabila seekor katak menghampirinya. Dayang-dayang Puteri Loli berlari dan menjerit. Hanya tinggal Faizah dan Puteri Loli saja yang tergaman akan kehadiran katak yang punya sayap.

" Kenak katak tok ada sayap Puteri?" tanya Faizah.

" Aok la. Ney tauk. Tang pelik jak mek tengok nya ya," kata Puteri Loli.

" Iboh kitak orang ejek aku. Aku makhluk Tuhan juak bha," kata Katak dengan selambanya.

" Hahaha!! Sikda mek orang ejek. Pa crita ko nektok Atak?" tanya Faizah.

" Eh,kitak kenal ngan nya tok kah Faizah?" tuan Puteri kebinggungan.

" Aok. Nya tok lah geng kamek dolok. Nya tok disumpah bah Tuan Puteri. Hencem nya dolok gikpun nya anak raja juak bah," explain si Faizah dengan aksi tangannya sekali.

"Ohh..Tedah,"

Maka,Si Katak itu pun bercerita sebab dan akibat dia menjadi seekor katak. Puteri Loli menangis sedu sedan apabila mendengarnya. Faizah hanya mampu diam seribu batu.

Enam minnggu berlalu dengan pantas. Faizah menngajak Puteri Loli ke The Spring.

" Kitak mok g the spRing sik dengan kamek?" tanya Faizah.

" Sikda mood mek. Mek rindu dengan Atak aie. Cney nya nektok?"

" Nya gik gago mok temu ayahanda nya di Negeri Samarahan nun. Mok bincang camney mok 'reverse' spell nya ya,"

" Aieh,dapat dimbak bincang kah?"

" Dapat kali. Mun sik mesti Atak cari bomoh ka dukun. Boh kitak binggung. Ada nya cari kitak lak,"

Kata-kata Faizah itu sedikit sebanyak melegakan hati Puteri Loli yang semakin resah.

" Sik mok mek g the spring dengan kitak. Lain kali lah.ok?"

" Mana-mana kitak. Iboh madah kitak boring lak," senyum Faizah kepada Puteri Loli.

Puteri Loli ke 7E bersama dayangnya,Nini. Nini seorang dayang yang pendiam tetapi pandai memasak. Puteri Loli menyuruh Nini membelikannya majalah Cleo di 7E. Nini hanya menurut perintah. Tiba-tiba kelibat seorang lelaki hencem lalu di hadapan Nini dan terlanggar tiang.

Puteri Loli terus mendapatkan lelaki itu. Maka berlakulah mata bertentangan mata. Nini hanya diam dan diam. Akhirnya,aksi memandang mata itu berakhir apabila Nini kentut dengan kuatnya. Adoh!!! (:

" Sory mek tengok kitak lamak gilak," kata lelaki itu.

" Oh.Sik hal lah. Kamek suka juak. Hehe!" kata Puteri Loli.

"Hish! kenja juak Loli tok," kata Nini dalam HATI. Haha!!!

" Oh ya! Kamek Dana.Kitak?" Lelaki itu menghulurkan tangannya.

" Mek Loli. Kacak nama kitak. Kedak orangnya juak,"

" Kitak tok suka muji mek. Segan mek.Jom kita g makan,"

" Sik dapat. Mek malam tok mok g Spa,"

" Oh..ok. sik hal lah. Lain kali jak. Kitak ada FB sik?"

" Haha! Ada.Lak add mek ok?"

" Sure!"

Hati Puteri Loli berbunga-bunga setelah bertemu dengan Dana. Beberapa hari kemudian,maka terjalin lah perasaan yang sudah dijangka di antara Dana dan Loli. Akhirnya,Dana melamar Loli.

"Loli,mok sik kitak kawen ngan mek?"

" Kinek tok kah?"

" Sik lah nektok. Lusa bha,"

" Erm..Tapi nak,mek belum sedia?"

" Kenak belum sedia? "

" Banyak yang kitak sik tauk pasal kamek,Dana,"

" Ha? Mena ka? Apa maksud kitak?"

" Kamek tok bukan rakyat biasa. Mek anak Raja,Raja Baba.Kenal sik?"

" Oh. Kamek tauk. Kamek tauk kitak dari dolok. Dari dolok gik Loli. Kitak jak sik kenal kamek,"

" Kenal kamek dari dolok? Macam ni ya?"

" Kamek lah Atak. Kamek Putera juak. Anak Raja Humu. Ingat sik?"

" Kitak Atak???!!! Kenak boleh jadi manusia balik tok?"

" Mek jadi manusia sebab mek g the spring hari ya dengan bonda mek. Apa ada kedai nok jual air sirap terbalikkan spell. Apa gik,mek beli lah. Ya alu jadi manusia," kata Dana.

" Jadi,nama manusia kitak Dana la? "

" Aok. Gney? Mok kawen sik dengan mek?"

" Haha!! Mok lah!"

Maka,perkahwinan mereka berdua berlansung dengan meriah. Negeri Song dan Negeri Samarahan bergabung menjadi satu negeri yang aman makmur. Raja Humu berusaha merampas harta Raja Baba tetapi baginda tidak sempat kerana baginda mangkat selepas majlis perkahiwnan antara anakanda mereka. Baginda tercekik apabila santap. Baginda tertelan cokelat LadyBird. (:. They live happily ever after!

The End

2010-05-20T13:05:00.002+08:00

Love is never perfect,Antonia

local,is the best!

2010-05-20T11:34:00.003+08:00

Saya berasa untung kerana kegilaan saya yang melampau terhadap drama dan filem melayu/tempatan memjadikan saya seorang insan yang berguna. Bak kata saya kepada ibu saya malam tadi semasa memasak di dapur,"It is worth to watch a lot of Malay dramas," Ibu saya hanya mampu tersenyum.

Pasti anda tertanya-tanya kenapa saya mengatakan diri saya berasa untung. Ini disebabkan oleh drama-drama yang kita tonton di kaca TV bukan sandiwara semata-mata. Obviusly,the dramas that we watched based on true stories.Meaning that,it do happen! All the tears that i shed of watching dramas worth a million life experience..haha!! I learnt alot bout life via media. Who said that TV is not a good thing? It is good! (:

Drama Melayu sinonim with cheating hubby/wife.poligami,cinta terhalang etc..gave me wide knowledge. How to deal with this kind of situation and how do we know the real human being with us. Friends or foes. It does help me alot. I really appreciate all the penerbit/pengarah/pelakon yang menjayakan all the local dramas. Dramas/films(local ones) is my life learning experience...By watching them all,i know what to do. It is worth to watch and sit for hours and hours. Non-stop! (:

Cikgu Antonia,tertanam begitu saja

2010-05-15T01:32:00.002+08:00

Harapan aku menjadi seorang pendidik musnah sekali lagi. Ini kali kedua impian aku tidak tercapai. Tidak mengapa. Aku mengerti. Ini kerana persaiangan yang sengit dan banyak serta guru lelaki kurang dan lebih menumpukan perhatian terhadap pengambilan guru lelaki. Aku tetap bangga kerana keputusan STPM aku mampu melayakkan aku ke Universiti. Sungguh kecewa apabila mendapat tahu bahawa aku tidak berjaya melayakkan diri ke temu duga. Ujian Medsi sudah dan dijawab dengan sejujur-jujurnya. Apapun,nasib tidak menyebelahi kita. Kata ibu aku,

" Tuhan tidak akan memberi dengan mudahnya dengan apa yang impikan,"

Nampaknya,pelbagai rintangan yang perlu aku lalui. Ini bukan kali pertama ya. Ini kedua kali aku direject untuk menjadi seorang guru. Apakan daya. Barangkali aku akan mendapat yang lebih baik. Can't wait. (:

Min & Zai

2010-05-13T13:49:00.002+08:00

Di manakah awak sekarang? Sudah puas saya mencari awak. Saya buntu. Kemanakah awak menghilang? Teringat saat saya bersama awak. Rindu saya kepada awak sangat mendalam sehinggakan dada saya ini mahu pecah. Hujan di siang hari mengingat saya kepada awak. Dulu awak lah yang menjadi sang suria di saat aku memerlukan cahaya.

Kenapa awak pergi meninggalkan saya tanpa mengucapkan selamat tinggal? Saya mencari awak seperti orang gila. Entah kemana awak menghilang. Sudah puas aku berjalan mencari pengganti awak tapi tiada siapa yang bisa. Hanya awak saja yang berjaya mengambil hati saya ini. Mengapa awak sungguh kejam? Membiarkan perasaan saya terhadap awak semakin mendalam. Geram sungguh saya. Saya sering melihat kalendar yang pernah awak berikan kepada saya suatu masa dulu. Bergenang air mata apabila saya tahu awak hilang begitu saja.

Saya membiarkan sesiapa saja menyentuh hati ini tapi tiada yang berjaya. Saya melihat awak dalam diri mereka.

" Minnn!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Saya masih teringat awak memanggil nama saya sambil berlari-lari ke arah saya. Sungguh sedih mengenang kembali zaman itu.

Saat ini lah tidak dapat saya lupakan.Sampai bila-bila.

" Min,mun saya sikda dengan awak,awak jaga diri ok?"

" Aieh! Kenak klaka macam tok Zai? Sik suka saya,"

" Mena la. Mun saya sikda,awak mesti jaga diri awak dengan baik-baik,"

" Awak tok bagi saya takut lah. Awak g cney Zai?"

" Sikda. Madah jak lah Min. Saya sayang awak,Min. Ingat janji kita,"

" Zai,saya sik paham apa yang awak kalaka tok...Aok.Akan saya ingat janji kita,"

Zai mencium dahi saya dan saya dapat merasakan perasaan Zai. Perasaan takut dan sayang yang mendalam.

Awak berjalan dengan pantas membiarkan saya keseorangan. Saya selalu ke tempat kita lepak bersama dulu. Saya masih ingat..Saya pernah bergambar membelakangi kamera awak,Zai. Sungguh berat hati ini apabila mendapat tahu awak meninggalkan saya tanpa khabar. Tapi saya sedar ada sebab awak berbuat demikian. Saya tetap tunggu awak,Zai.

Pilah Poloh

2010-05-11T23:48:00.002+08:00

Sebaik saja kaki Poloh berada di pejabat temannya,Pilah,dia terpingga-pingga. Dia seperti 'lost direction' atau dia sengaja berbuat demikian kerana dia memang manusia yang pelik. Tiada siapa dapat menjawabnya. Pilah memanggil Poloh ke dalam pejabatnya. Aksi Poloh mengelikan hati Pilah saat hati Pilah remuk dek kereta accident oleh bekas kekasihnya yang khabarnya bernikah di Gombak,Thailand dengan bekas isteri jiran abangnya,LiLuh.

Setiausaha Pilah,Murni berada di dalam pejabat Pilah setia menanti arahan yang bakal diterima. Poloh merasakan dunianya berhenti seketika saat mata Murni dan Poloh bertentangan. Pilah menjadi rimas akibat aksi berani berahi mereka berdua lalu menghempas fail Popular yang berwarna kuning pekat itu ke atas meja Lorenzo yang berhanrga RM58090. Mahal tu!

Murni terkejut lalu meminta maaf atas kelakuannya itu. Mata Pilah tajam merenung zip seluar Poloh yang gerabak seluarnya terbahagi kepada dua. Oh! Malunya Poloh. Pilah tersipu-sipu malu sambil menjemput Poloh duduk. Murni diarahkan untuk menghidang Poloh kopi kaw kaw. Sesi omogan kosong berlaku dengan pantas!

" Kitak pahal tengok Murni semacam ya? Minat kah?"

" Hesh. Sikdalah. Cuma sik pernah nangga ompuan kacak,"

" Mena? Mun minat,padah jak sia. Lak kamek berik nombo tepon,"

" SIk perlu lah. Gikpun Murni ya bukan taste mek gilak. Mek suka yang,kaw kaw!"

" Hesh nya tok koh! Hahaha!!!"

Mereka ketawa seperti tiada yang mendengar. Sungguh buruk ketawa Poloh.

Pilah merasa meluat melihat sikap Poloh. Belum sempat Murni datang membawa dulang yang penuh dengan cawan, Pilah sudah menyuruhya pulang ke tempat Murni sendiri. Murni blurr sebentar.

" Pahal bos? Tadik nyuruh orang molah air.Nektok suruh balik. Gney ngan kopi tok?"

" Sikda hal! Kau balik jak tempat kau ya. Kopi ya kau simpam lam ais box"

" Neypat. ais box dah penuh ngan kek Secret Recipe bos. Camni lah?"

" Camni camni gik nya tok. Kau tok ada utak sik? Yala kau secretary,tauk nyelesai masalah,"

" Humm..Aok bha. Lak engkha di sia,"

Pilah hanya mampu menganguk kepalanya sebanyak tiga kali. Menandakan dia faham dan signal menyuruh Murni keluar.

" Eh Puan Pilah.Air mek ney?" tanya Poloh dengan selambanya.

" Ehh!! Pa Puan ha? Kamek lom kawen gik. Ok?" jawab Pilah sambil mengatur blousenya.

" Habis ya? Apalah? Blurr mek tok eyh,"

" Iboh tanya. Pelik na juak! Kopi kitak dah kamek bekukan lam ais box,"

" Hadoh! Kenak macam ya indah?"

" Dah kamek nyuruh? Kamek kan BOS!"

" Lupak eh,haha!" Ketawa Poloh.

Selama 10 minit berbual kosong,akhirnya CIK Pilah mengambil Poloh menjadi drivernya. Pilah memberikan kunci kereta BMW X5nya kepada Poloh dengan hati yang berdebar-debar.

" Boleh sik aku cayak mbiak tok eyh," tanya hati kecil Pilah.

" Bos bos,kenak lah bodoh gilak cayak kamek," kata hati kecil Poloh.

Murni berjalan dengan seayu-ayunya. Tiba-tiba kasut tumit tinggi Murni patah. Poloh sepantas kilat menyambut Murni daripada terjatuh terkena tile marble ofis Cik Pilah. Adengan yang sungguh romantik!

Cik Pilah hanya melihat dari tembok kecil yang memisahkan antara jamban lelaki dengan jamban wanita. Cik pilah sedih,sedih dan sedih. Tiba-tiba,seorang jejaka macho yang bernama Moto memeluk erat Pilah dari belakang. Terkejut Pilah dibuatnya.

" Hah? who are you??"

" Ops! salah orang. sorry!"

Hati Pilah terdetik. Siapakah lelaki itu. Macho sungguh! Rupa-rupanya si Macho itu,Moto teman lelaki Poloh! Pilah melihat mereka berdua berciuman di belakang penyapu dan mop cleaner di dalam jamban OKU. Sungguh mengelikan! Murni hanya mampu tergaman dan teringin sekali melihat dengan lebih lanjut. Akan tetapi,Pilah sempat menarik tangan Murni dan berlari anak ke arah parking lot. Di sana Murni memberitahu sesuatu kepada bosnya.

" Bos! Bos tauk sik yang Poloh ya GAY?"

" Sik tauk. Kenak? "

" Sikda bah. Murni rasa,bos macam ada hati ngan Poloh. Harap Murni salah lah,"

" Hish. Sikdala. Bos sik suka ngan laki poyo kedak Poloh ya. Lalek nya la. Mun nya gay,gay la sia,"

Murni meminta diri dan berjalan menuju ke keretanya sambil berkaki ayam. Tinggal Pilah keseorangan sambil menunggu Poloh datang kerana Poloh kan driver Pilah. Hahaha!!!Tiba-tiba....

Oh tidak...!!! Pilah sebenarnya sudah jatuh cinta dengan Poloh. Cinta Pilah musnah sekali lagi kerana mendapat tahu bahawa Poloh mempunyai teman lelaki. Kenapa Moto memeluk Pilah? Hairan ya?? Kenapa?

Jangan ditanya. Sudah jalan ceritanya begini. Ikut dan baca sahaja. Sekian,TAMAT

Hasrat Si Dewi

2010-05-11T09:27:00.002+08:00

Dewi sedang makan apabila seekor lalat hingap di atas straw minuman cokelat strawberinya. Dewi tidak menyedari lalat itu dengan selambanya minum minuman Dewi. Hebat sungguh lalat ini. Tiba-tiba seekor lipas berjalan ke arah lalat dan bertanya.

" Lat! Pa ko polah ya? Skati jak minum air Dewi.Manas nya lak!"

" Ko gago pahal? Sikda aku ngaco kau. Juah nun!"

" Kau lak kena bunuh si Dewi lak.Nya pantang nangga orang minum air nya."

" Ko tok eyh,nang sik paham reti jauh ka? Ko lak aku smack that lak!"

"Aiieehhhhh...!"

Maka wujudlah satu pergaduhan antara dua spesis yang sama keluarga itu,keluarga SERANGGA.

Dewi menyedari air kegemarannya habis. Muka Dewi merah kerana menahan marah dan akhirnya meletup sehingga menyebabkan meja dan kerusi makannya terbang ke langit. Dewi ini ada kuasa yang sungguh hebat. Dia bisa membaling barang dengan kelajuan yang maksima dan nescaya,barang siapa yang kena,pasti KONDEM!

" Dewi!!!" Jerit kekasih hatinya

Dewi merenung Dewanya dengan renungan yang tajam. Dia seperti ingin menelan Dewa hidup-hidup. Dewa cuba mengawalnya dengan alunan muzik dari handphonenya tetapi cubaan Dewa gagal. Dewi betul-betul marah.

" Dewi! Pahal kitak ya? Manas na juak eyh,"

" Kitak ya.Pahal sik bli Ridsect?"

" Aieh. Gaji lom masuk.Sikda duit gik mek tok yang,"

" Eksen kitak ya! Duit banyak ada. Maka keja government,"

" Kitak sik tauk.Mok bayar sewa umah,loan keta gik. Bil gik. Duit ney pat tahan,"

" Bulak kitak ya. Kamek tauk kitak sik mok bli barang dapur.Padah jak sia,"

" Bulak indah. Kamek dah beli Ridscet riya. Enam igek dibeli,"

Dewi berasa marah dan berlari ke dapur. Di dapur,Dewi mengambil sebilah pisau dan mengugut Dewa.

" Mun kitak sayang kamek,kamek mok kitak nektok g Ta Kiong beli Ridsect. Nektok ada sale. Cepat beli!"

" Kenak manas gilak? Mun mok bunuh nyamuk skalipun,kita guna cara lain. Bakar daun kering ka pa,"

" arrggh! sikda sikda! Kamek mok kitak beli juak. Gara-gara lalat,habis air febret mek diminumnya!"

" Ha? Tegal ya jak? Bagus mena lalat ya."

" Beli ka sik? Mun sik,mek kerat jak tangan mek tok,"

" Ehhh..Jangan Dewi. Kamek gik sayang kitak. Ok ok. Nektok juak mek beli,"

Dewi senyum tersengih-sengih. Takut juga dia dengan aku ya. Kata Dewi dalam hati. Dewi ketawa sekuat-kuatnya sehinggakan lalat dan lipas berhenti bergaduh.

"Pahal Dewi tetak kedak orang gila ya Lat?" Tanya Lipas.

" Ney tauk ar. Kali dah kena racun aku nak Pas?" Jawab Lalat sambil mengatur rambut Lipas.

" Kali juak. Udah gik kita duak Lat. Malas mok kelahi tok. Kepak ada jak,"

" Aok la.." Kata Lalat sambil berjabat tangan dengan Lipas.

Dewi menunggu Dewa di halaman rumah mereka sambil menghisap sepuntung rokok. Dari jauh Dewi dapat mendengar bunyi motosikal Dewanya dan berlari-lari anak ke arah Dewa.

" Udah tek sayang?"

" Aiek! Bersayang indah ngan kamek. Pahal tok? Demam ka?"

" Nya tok eyh. Orang mok manja pun sik boleh. Sikpalah!" Merajuk si Dewi.

" Nah. Tok barang yang kitak minta tek. Kamek mok g kemas stor lok,"

YESS!!!! Jerit Dewi penuh kegirangan. Akhirnya,barang yang dikehendaki sudah ada. Dengan penuh semangatnya,Dewi berjalan mencari Lipas dan Lalat. Jalan punya jalan,HAH! Sudah jumpa! Cis! Lalat dan Lipas sedang melayari FB mereka dengan penuh perasaan.

Dewi dengan selambanya menyembur Ridsect ke arah mereka. Nah! Rasakan!

"Ohh Tidaaaakkkk!!!!!!!!" Jerit Lipas dan Lalat.

" Hahha!! Inilah pembalasan you two yang minum air favorite aku yah! Nah!!! Ambik kau!" jerit Dewi.

"Laattttttt..."

"Passs......."

Akan tetapi,Lalat sempat menulis di wall FB nya begini buat kali terakhir,

" Teman.I no more longer in this world. Goodbye! Password FB account aku ialah lipaslalat.Bye!"

Dewi dan Dewa menikmati malam mereka dengan penuh kasih sayang. Hasrat si Dewi sudah tercapai.

T.H.E E.N.D

Dinding Pipi

2010-05-06T22:17:00.002+08:00

Pipi,nama aku. Aku ingin berkongsi cerita tentang kisah DINDING aku. Dinding aku berwarna putih. Tiada sebarang corak ataupun warna lain melainkan putih. Tidak tersentuh dinding aku. Aku gelar dinding aku,DINDING PIPI. Bermulalah kisah aku.

Aku ke sekolah,abah yang hantarkan. Pulang begitu juga. Aku selalu tunggu di perhentian bas di hadapan sekolah aku. Di sana aku dapat melihat musuh-musuh aku berdiri menunggu bas awam. Ingin sekali aku menolak mereka ke tengah jalan raya. Haha! Sungguh liar imaginasi aku. Jantung aku seperti berhenti seketika saat kepala aku pusing 180 darjah ke timur. Aku melihat seorang lelaki berkulit cerah memeluk buku teks tebal di hujung perhentian bas. Mata aku terpana seketika. Budak barukah? Hati aku bertanya. Mungkin. Tidak aku hiraukan. Tetapi aku tidak mengerti mengapa mata aku sering melihat ke arah nya. Seperti daya magnet.

Lima belas minit berlalu. Abah belum tiba lagi. Resah aku dibuatnya. HP aku 'low batt'. Tak dapat membuat panggilan. Aku tengok sekeliling,hanya aku dan lelaki cerah itu yang tinggal. Pelik! Kenapa dia belum pulang lagi? Aku tidak sedar aku melihatnya sehinggakan dia perasan.

Dia melihat aku!! Oh. Aku terus buat derk. Haha! Tiba-tiba aku merasakan ada sesorang meuju ke arah aku. Hati aku berkata," Mesti dia ni," Tekaan aku benar!

Dia ingin berbual dengan aku. Rupanya dia tidak tahu bas nombor berapa ke pasar. Aku memberitahunya dengan nada yang sopan sambil mata kami bertentangan. Oh. Begitu indah rasanya.

Akhirnya,Abah aku sampai. Muka aku masam mencuka apabila masuk ke dalam kereta abah. Semasa aku ingin menutup pintu kereta abah aku,aku sempat melemparkan senyuman aku semanis-manisnya kepadanya.

Apakah ini cinta pandang pertama? Pipi!

Hari-hari aku penuh dengan ceria sang pelangi. Aku hanya mampu melihat nya dari jauh. Tak berani aku meluahkan hati aku kepadanya kerana aku tahu,tidak mudah bagi aku mendapatkannya. Tiap kali mata bertentangan,hati ini berdegup dengan lebih kencang. Senyuman di bibir ini sering terukir. Indahnya sekira dia tahu perasaan aku yang bernama Pipi.

Setahun kemudian,perasaan aku masih ada.Masih sama. Tidak mudah aku lupa saat pertama aku bertemu dengan nya. The moment was so vivid. Aku sedih kerana dia punya seorang teman. Wajar baginya. Aku memang tidak mengharapkan apa-apa daripadanya. Biar saja cinta aku dalam hati. Hanya dia yang ada di hati aku. Terluka hatiku,tiada yang tahu. Ku relakan dia. Inilah fasa kehidupan aku sebagai Pipi.

Dinding Pipi dulunya penuh dengan warna-warni dan corak yang pelbagai. Kini,sudah tahu kekasih gelap punya teman,dinding itu mulai hilang warnanya. Kembali ke warna asal,putih. Aku hanya menunggu 'pelukis' yang baru untuk melukis corak dan mewarnai dinding aku,Dinding Pipi.Sakitnya hati apabila dia tidak tahu perasaan aku,wahai pelukis cinta pandang pertama aku.

Fish...Drama Queen!

2010-05-06T13:10:00.007+08:00

Aduh!

Aku menahan sakit perut aku. Ini kali ke lima belas aku ke kamar mandi. Apa yang aku makan tengah hari tadi ya? Telefon bimbit kepunyaan Totong tertinggal di luar rumah. Mati! Kalau orang nampak pasti kena ambil. Arrggh! Perut aku harus diutamakan.

Belum sempat aku memegang tombol pintu toilet,aku terdengar bunyi enjin BMW X5 kepunyaan Hubby aku. Oh! PARTI NINI! Terlupa la pulak....adoh!

Aku terus lari-lari anak ke arah pagar rumah aku yang baru saja aku renovate. Hehe! Hubby aku senyum kambing dan terus memberi flying kiss. Nah! Dah dapat dah flying kiss mu,Hubby.

" Fish,kenapa muka Fish pucat? Hubby bawa ke klinik ok?"

"Tak perlu lah B. Fish okay. Fish sakit perut. Boring jamban tengok *tut* Fish,"

"Fish nie,cakap tak senonoh. Cium nanti,"

" B nie,jangan la cium kat sini. Malu la kalau orang tengok."

Hubby dan aku ketawa sekuat-kuatnya. Jangan hairan dengan kami berdua. Inilah cara kami berdua melukis cinta. Sungguh CHILDISH! Haha!

Aku menyuruh Hubby aku menunggu dalam keretanya. Aku tidak jadi menunaikan hajat aku ke toilet. Tiba-tiba saja perut aku tidak sakit. Mungkin ubatnya flying kiss Hubby aku.Oh! Terharunya aku. Aku terus ke kamar aku dan duduk di bangku meja make-up aku. Tangan aku pantas menghias muka aku yang agak pucat. Sekarang,aku sudah tidak pucat! Terima kasih kepada MAC. (:

Hubby sungguh romantik. Dia membuka pintu kereta untuk aku. Oh so sweet! Jangan jer time ini dia so sweet. Bila dah kahwin,so sour la pula! Hmph! Sebaik saja masuk ke dalam kereta Hubby,aku ternampak bekas gincu di kolar baju Hubby!!!! Oh no!!!!!!!!!!

Aku diam seribu batu. Air mata terus mengalir membasahi pipi tanpa aku sedari. Hubby yang dari tadi sedang sibuk fokus di jalan raya terpaksa membuat signal light untuk berhenti di bahu Jalan Merah. Dialog bermula.

" Fish,kenapa ni? Masih sakit perut ke? Nanti B bawa ke Klinik Dr.Faizah,ok?"

" B,Dr.Faizah sekarang ini di London. Upacara akad nikah dia disana. Tak perlu lah B. Fish okay jer,"

" B tak rasa Fish okay. B rasa Fish bohong. Fish,something wrong? Sounds so fishy here,"

" B!!! Fish cakap OK,Ok lah. Jangan paksa. Jum. Nanti lambat kita ke parti Nini,"

" Yala,"

Aku dapat merasakan kemarahan B. Aku tidak mahu menegur bekas gincu di kolar baju B. Siapa tuan punya bekas gincu itu ya?? Sungguh misteri. Aku hairan. Kenapa aku tidak marah? Mungkin kisah lama membuatkan aku lebih peka dan profesional. Yah! Benar! Aku harus selidik.

Rumah Nini sungguh indah. Alangkah indanya kalau Dr.Faizah ada juga. Oppz! Lupa nak bagitahu. Dr Faizah itu kawan aku dengan Nini. Datin Ernie juga kawan kami. Tapi dia sekarang di Australia. Honeymoon dengan suami dia. Dato' Amanda sedang sibuk di Jepun. Buiseness woman lah katakan. Aku? Aku rakyat biasa. Aku model. Nini pula,seorang peguam yang terkenal. Hebat sungguh teman wanita aku ya.

Rumah Nini memang menjadi idaman kalbu setiap wanita. Sungguh indah.Penuh dengan bunga-bunga. Memang terasa segar. Hubby aku memeluk aku dengan erat di depan Nini. Nini memberi satu reaksi yang kurang senang.

" Fish! Iboh manja-manja depan kamek. Segan lah,"

" Ops! Sorry Nini. Sik sengaja. Ney Popol you?"

" Oh,Popol ada. Di belakang dengan adiknya. Kenak?"

" Sikda. Tanya jak. Eh,Faizah kahwin sik ajak kita. Kecik hati eh,"

" Fish..Fish...Orang ya kahwin dengan sidak Sinclair. Kelak nya polah la di sitok,"

"Mena! kelak kita MMS,"

Satu parti yang meriah. Kami semua begembira. Kami menari,ketawa dan bermain. Hilang segala stress di tempat kerja. Hubby aku senyum melihat karenah aku bersama Nini. Popol sibuk mengambil gambar kami berdua. Cinta Popol terhadap Nininya dapat aku rasakan. Apakah aku,Fish dapat merasakan cinta itu daripada B?

B memandu dengan laju pada malam itu. Aku masih ingin tahu bekas gincu itu. Akhirnya aku memaksa Hubby berhenti di depan bus-stop Chonglin. Hubby hairan dengan reaksi aku.

"Kenapa Fish??"

" B! Kenak ada gincu d kolar B?? Sapa pun ya??" Terkeluar dialek Sarawak aku.

" Tak faham la Fish!"

Oops! Terlupa pula aku. Hubby aku ini orang Cina Indonesia. Dia hanya fasih berbahasa Melayu baku. Hehe! Balik kepada dialog.

" No. What i meant was,why ada kesan lipstick at your collar B?? Who is that woman?? Tell me!!!!!!!!!"

" Fish! Sah you nyanyuk! Can't you remember a thing??"

" No! You are cheating on me B! I hate you!"

Aku terus keluar dari kereta Hubby aku dan menangis teresak-esak di bangku bus-stop. Hubby aku terus memujuk dan memujuk. Oh! Why is he so sweet? sedang kan he is cheating on me,ME!!!! Arrgghh!

Aku melihat mata B dengan penuh kasih sayang dan memegang erat tangannya.

" B,do you know how much i love you?"

" No Fish. How much?"

" Heeshh,,,Nya tok! lagging ada. That much!" aku menunjuk ke arah langit.

" Why langit?"

" You will understand someday and B,i know you are cheating on me,"

" Fish,i did not. Sumpah!"

" Jangan main sumpah-sumpah here. Jangan nak tipu lah B. I saw it. On your collar,"

" No. It was yours la Fish!"

MINE???

When???

Haha!

Guess what?

" B, Fish sengaja buat drama lah! Lama dah tak gaduh-gaduh. I know that kesan gincu was mine. Saja-saja jak,"

Hahaha!!

Now,B is merajuk..So,i gotta go guys! Nak pujuk my Hubby sebab i was too DRAMTIC,drama queen la katakan (:

Thanks Mama (:

2010-05-06T01:49:00.004+08:00

My Mama,Madam Cecilia gave me this beautiful gelang. I like it so much!! The colour suits me and it fits me well! (; Thanks Mak..!!!!!

K.A.M.I beR-3

2010-05-06T01:31:00.003+08:00

:: BCL::

Dato Siti Nurhaliza dengan sahabat baiknya,KD.

Nuraini Assan-Dato Siti

Antonia Vera-KD

Seorang lagi,

Bunga Citra Lestari,BSL-Nur Faizah Samad..

hehehe!

Cinta Kumbang & Nia

2010-05-06T00:17:00.002+08:00

Aku,Nia bukan sebarang wanita. Umur sudah 20 tahun. Hidup menjadi seorang Nia sangat sangat sukar. Ada yang indah ada yang tidak. Memang aku akui aku bukan seorang wanita yang sempurna. Wajah aku tak selicin cawan,gigi ku tak seindah pagar rapat..Tapi aku bangga kerana ketidaksempurnaan aku itu itu berjaya menawan hati si Kumbang yang sedang terbang beterbangan. Aku hanya mampu tergaman dan menikmati rasa cinta. Oh,indahnya saat itu.

Apabila bulan dan bintang jatuh ke bumi,ingin sekali aku mengutip tetapi kumbangku menghalang. Entah mengapa. Kumbang ku menyuruh aku tidak menyentuh bulan dan bintang itu. Aku hairan dan hairan. Hati ku meronta untuk bertanya "mengapa sayangku?"

Kumbangku hanya memberi satu ekspresi kosong. Tiada yang mampu aku coretkan. Diam sejenak kerana terlalu memikirkan hal bulan bintang itu. Mengapa? Mengapa? Benda yang indah jatuh ke bumi tidak bisa diambil sebegitu mudah? Aku terpingga-pingga sehingga membuatkan kumbangku menampar wajah aku yang semakin pulih dari gejala sosial jerawat. Humm....Mengapa sungguh tega dia menampar aku? Jauh di sudut hati aku,mungkinkah tiada lagi cinta di hatinya. Noktah cinta? Tidak! Aku mengambil serbuk cinta yang Mak Nini aku berikan seabad yang lalu. Aku hembuskan serbuk itu ke muka kumbang. Ohh!!!!

Kumbang aku menepis tangan aku dengan tenaga yang luar biasa. Marah sungguh dia kepada aku. Kenapa aku menjadi bodoh? Menghembus serbuk cinta demi menjawab segala pertanyaan di hati aku ini? Aku terus berlari ke arah rumah mainan Kumbang dan aku. Di sana aku mengambil penyapu lidi dan memukul Kumbang sepuas puasnya. Kumbang hanya merelakan dirinya dipukul.

Aku seperti kehilangan tenaga. Aku berhenti dan sempat meneguk segelas air oren. Kumbang pun bertanya;

"Sudah kau puas memukul aku dengan penyapu lidi pemberian Puan Faizah?"

" arrgghh,apa kau nak peduli? bukannya kau guna penyapu ini!"

Bentak aku sambil menitiskan air mata.

Kumbang terus memeluk aku. Aku hanya mampu menangis. Semakin kuat tangisan aku. Tiada yang lebih membahagiakan lebih dari saat Kumbang memeluk aku. Seperti dunia terhenti seketika.

Kumbang mencium dahi aku dan berkata,

" Bukan apa Kumbang tak izinkan dinda mengambil bulan dan bintang itu,Kumbang tidak suka kerana Dinda terlalu sempurna untuk mengutip bulan dan bintang itu,"

Aku tergaman. aku tidak mengerti kata-kata Kumbang. Aku merasakan telinga aku tidak dapat menerimanya. Oh Kumbang,apa yang kau ingin sampaikan kepada aku? Aku memejam mata sambil memegang erat tangan Kumbang.

"Dinda,Kumbang telah ambil bulan dan bintang ini. Biar kanda yang ambil ini untuk dinda. Kanda ingin membuktikan cinta kanda kepada dinda. Kanda telah menyeru Dewa Bulan Bintang agar jatuhkan cinta mereka ke bumi. Akhirnya,kanda dapat bulan dan bintang untuk dinda. Kanda ingin menjadi orang yang pertama mengambil dan memberinya kepada dinda,"

Ohh Kanda Kumbang......

she is my ring

2010-05-05T10:23:00.002+08:00

I bought a ring for myself. This ring gonna be my ring that protects me from any harm that might endanger my life! Hahaha!!!

The moment i saw it,i fell in love. It's very simply ring plus it cheap. (: It has the 'ukiran'...mcm ukiran Bank BSN,the paku pakis thingy. I straight away to the cashier and paid it. Hehehe...I put that ring on my finger. Jari telunjuk. Nini told me,whenever we put a ring in our jari telunjuk,it means we rampas people's hubby. Do not know whether it is true. I like my ring to be on that jari. i dulu. so far,no rampas-rampas.Hahaha.! Hubby orang minat i adalah... :P

The ring that i bought sorta a promise ring. It will remind me. So,i must take a good care of that ring. I used to have a beautiful jade ring. A friend of mine lost it. I should not lend her my ring.

I am having coffee everyday and makes my teeth yellow... Wanna see dentist to whiten my teeth. (:

Need to be beautiful and clean this days... (:

kerinduan seorang sahabat

2010-05-04T16:08:00.000+08:00

duhai insan,pilih lah yang benar

2010-05-04T14:46:00.001+08:00

ekspresi ku seperti kupu-kupu

2010-05-04T14:18:00.005+08:00

Impian ku yang satu

2010-05-03T19:18:00.002+08:00

Hari ini aku bangun agak awal seperti biasa. Aku ada sebuah bilik yang kecil dan cute,tapi semalam aku tidur di ruang tamu kerana nak layan tengok DVD Hindustan yang baru aku beli. Hehe! Selepas aku cuci muka dan gosok gigi,seperti biasa,aku SMS la kekasih hati aku. Sarapan aku hanya roti dan teh. Sepatutnya aku ke rumah Clo,tapi dia ada 'driving lesson'. Last minute. So,tomorrow la aku pergi. Nak ambik baju daripada Clo. Banyak rancangan dalaim kepala aku hari ini. akhirnya aku memilih mendengar lagu Jazz sepanjang petang sehingga tertidur. Selepas aku bangun dari tidur petang aku,aku punyai satu rancagan yang belum aku lakukan,iaitu menjadi AHLI PERPUSTAKAAN!!! Hahaha!!!! Esok aku enrolll myself selepas ambil barang daripada Clo. Tak sabar nak pinjam banyak buku. Novel...yes! yes! Daripada aku buang duit beli,bagus aku pinjam. I really can't wait.

Semenjak dah pencen dari part-promoter ini,aku kena asah balik kemahiran memasak aku. Macam-macam aku lakukan untuk refresh my memory. Hehehe...Tak lama lagi aku dengan mak aku nak buat kek dan biskut sempena Gawai yang bakal menjelma.

So,can't wait for my tomorrow's plan!!!! smile smile (:

aku & basikal

2010-05-03T11:38:00.002+08:00

Bukan aku tak mahu mendekati mu.Aku ada sebab tertentu. Aku bukan ada niat untuk membalas segala perbuatan mu. Bukan niatku. Aku bukan manusia yang sempurna. Tidak mudah bagi aku melupakan kisah yang lalu. Biarkanlah berlalu. Aku sudah temui cahaya. Sungguhpun aku mengerti cahaya itu pasti akan lenyap. Sedih hati aku sudah aku rasakan. Tiada mampu aku katakan melainkan menanti suatu yang pasti. Pasti akan berlaku tapi tidak pasti siapa pelaku. Aku hanya ingin duduk di tengah-tengah ladang teh yang penuh dengan embun pagi. Ingin aku berbasikal bersendirian dan memamhami segala yang berlaku di sekeliling. Andai kata aku berbasikal tanpa henti, aku lah manusia yang bodoh! Tidak ingin berhenti dan lihat. Aku mahu berbasikal sentiasa tanpa henti tapi apakan daya,bunga tayar basikal pasti botak. Aku pasti jatuh dan berhenti. Di saat aku jatuh,pasti luka dan aku akan menyesal kerana sering berbasikal.

Aku inginkan sebuah basikal yang mampu menjadi teman yang setia.

My Darl

2010-05-01T11:46:00.002+08:00

Past few days made me gone crazy. I no longer working as a part-time promoter. I have a lot of commitments this coming weeks.

He came back after a long period of my own self disappearance. I was running away from him and he was searching for me. Sat for a while to gain the old same feeling and it did not. I was quite surprise with that feeling. I guess,friends for now. No longer the same old feeling. Just like Aliyah song's,Tak Mungkin Kerna Sayang. I was seeking advice for the next action. A good friend of mine said "Teruskan apa yang ada sekarang". It made sense to me. I do not want to turn back. I was hurt and i dont want to get hurt again. Sad days for me.

But,i have my darl now. I care much for him. He is mine. We shared ups and downs and he knew my past. Gladly he could accept it well. Thank u,darl. (:

Bunga Citra Lestari - Karena Ku Cinta Kau (Official Video Clip)

2010-04-30T10:22:00.000+08:00

diam-diam kau melihat cintaku..

2010-04-28T08:39:00.003+08:00

Dulu aku tak suka lagu Akim & Mila,Kau dan Aku. I do not know why. I just don't like the song,at first. After i watched their video clip i was amazed. I didn't know why i feel touch after hearing the song. Setelah aku teliti their lyric I GOT IT. Memang best giler!!! Macam kisah aku lah...hehe.!! (:

MEDSI daku

2010-04-26T20:41:00.000+08:00

soalan MEDSI sungguh pelik tapi..... (:

Langkah pertama aku....

2010-04-21T23:15:00.002+08:00

Aku akan menjalani ujian MEDSI pada Sabtu ini di SMK Tabuan Jaya. All the best to me! Moga dapat harungi ini kerana cita-cita yang mendalam terhadap perguruan. Hanya aku mampu senyum. Tak boleh too excited. Later takut benda yang kita nak tak tercapai. (:

the history of how i ADORE to COOK

2010-04-20T18:26:00.004+08:00

Lapar! Hungry! Seberei !! Bring the same meaning! (: Food,makanan,koyuh naan is the same meaning too (:

I was afraid to KITCHEN! I hate memasak so much! I just do not know why. Aku benci tengok kuali,senduk,stove etc. Maybe i am not born to cook. Well,memasak benda basic it's my stuff. For example,goreng telur,masak Maggie mee,masak air,masak nasi and u name it,yang basic jer lah. Haha...That was few years ago untill i met this beautiful young lady who made me wanna learn more dalam bab memasak. She is the LUCKY NINI!!! hahaha! well,i admired her for her the most delicious local cuisine ever! I was so attracted to her kari sotong and did ask a recipe from her.

One day, i wanted to masak dinner for my family. I wanted to used Nini's recipe but we did not have sotong that time.! So, i texted Nini how! Hahaha. she told me to substitute the sotong to manok/ayam/chicken. The difference is that do not use the seafood curry powder if u want to cook chicken curry. I was a bad cook! Haha...Luckily,we do have chicken curry powder and apa lagi,gasak lah! Masak punya masak penuh dengan feel..Fuuhhh! It was a success..Of course it was not perfect chicken curry as Ninis'. I kept on improving my chicken curry. It's like a month my family kena makan curry gara-gara aku nak betul-betul expert in that cooking. I did it! My curry is among the top list in my family's dinner menu..Hahaha!

From chicken curry to biscuits! I got recipe from Nini,again. I made cornflake crisp and it was a success! I gave to my Business teacher,Dr.Chai to taste and he said it was GOOD ENOUGH for a beginner and Mdm Iris,my MUET teacher said i need to improve more. I accepted her opinion.Start from that day,i enjoy baking and cooking. Now,I love to cook!!! (:

Thank you to Nuraini Assan for making me like a lady. Because of her,i know how to cook better. Smile smile! Cheers to Nini!!! :)

saya seorang yang GEULIS

2010-04-20T12:26:00.001+08:00

haha..belajar bahasa sunda memang best! wanna learn more.... (:

*geulis maksud cantik (:

Bosan..Wayang? tiada $$

2010-04-20T12:08:00.003+08:00

Daku kebosanan pada hari ini. Daku tak bekerja kerana kurang sihat. Batuk yang melampau mampu membuatkan pelanggan lari. Itu menjadi keresahan yang utama bagi Kak Ham iaitu senior aku. Kira bos aku la. Dia la satu-satu insan yang sama kepala dengan aku. aku seronok bekerja dengan dia. Hehe.. Tak lama lagi aku berhenti kerja kerana panggilan ilmu datang. Belum pasti lagi tapi akan tiba. Cuma aku duduk menanti. Telefon bimbit aku sunyi sepi. Tiada SMS,MMS ataupun call. Biasala..Sekarang ini kegawatan ekonomi. Gaji daku belum masuk lagi. Barangkali punch card aku lambat dihantar ke KL. Oleh sebab itu,gaji aku belum masuk lagi.Aduh. Sudah kering rasanya purse Sentini aku akan 'air' wang kertas..Haha!!! Tidak dapat dibendung lagi kebosanan aku.

Mahu menonton wayang wang tiada. Malas hendak cucuk wang di ATM. Takut wang mudah hilang kerana nafsu SHOPPING yang melampau. Lebih baik hidup seperti tiada wang. (: Ingin sekali menonton filem terbaru Farid Kamil yang sentiasa menjadi pujaan aku. Gandingan beliau dengan Lisa memang aku restui..hehe! Filem itu,Semerah Cinta Stiletto. Siapa yang harus aku dengan menonton filem itu?

Semestinya sesorang yang rapat la... (:

I am so IN LOVE

2010-04-20T11:59:00.000+08:00

Jazz is the only that i love to hear..Ohh My.....

TILU

2010-04-20T11:54:00.003+08:00

Mendengar lagu mereka,Ku Bukan Aku made me WHOA! I never know that TILU from Malaysia....hehehe! I love their song..Im gonna be their fan...FF(Fan Forever!) Buat pengertian saya,Tilu means Three in bahasa Sunda,kalau tak silap la..but they are more than three/tilu....hahha!

Jalan Jalan Entah ke mana...

2010-04-20T11:48:00.001+08:00

Kemanakah akan aku tuju selepas ini? Ke Sabah? Masih menetap di Sarawak? Atau ke Semenanjung Malaysia? Alangkah indahnya aku ke Indonesia... (:

my needs to be fulfilled!

2010-04-19T22:54:00.003+08:00

Salty of my food doesn't mean that i have the worse taste bud ever!
Sweet too sweet my tea doesn't mean i love my tea to be SWEET
Bitter my coffee doesn't mean i am COFFEE addict.
Milo is getting expensive, doesn't mean i am going to stop buying and drinking MILO.
What all can i say, i need sugar,salt,coffee and Milo in my life! and tea too... (:

a bit of SASTERA bite

2010-04-19T22:45:00.002+08:00

Kenapa orang sentiasa menganggap aku sesuatu yang negatif? Padahal,saya ikhlas mengenal hati budinya. Kerana rupa paras aku yang kurang? Atau aku sememangnya tidak layak kerana perbezaan umur dan agama? Jangan lah terlampau menilai orang sehingga aku merasakan diri ini tidak layak berkawan dengan nya. Aku hanya seorang insan yang ingin mengenal hati budi sesorang. Mata dari hilir jauh melihat sang hati di hulu. Sang hati pura-pura tidak membalas. Takut. Mata memandang dan memandang akhir jatuh ke sang hati. Mula la episod epik yang belum tentu punya kesudahan yang gembira. Tangan mengigil tatkala nama di panggil.Beginikah rasanya?

Risau sungguh melihat ramai mata menjamah nya. Tapi kerisauan itu akan membunuh aku. Sang hati sentiasa menjalankan tugasnya untuk bersabar. Wahai mata-mata.! Janganlah dikau terlalu taksub melihat sesuatu yang indah. Indah itu akan bertukar buruk apabila direnung acap kali. Oh...Kedengaran seperti satu perasaan yang baru iaitu,CEMBURU. Lari-lari sang hati daripada cemburu. Tapi cemburu sentiasa mengekori kerana..Hati dengan cemburu tak boleh dipisahkan...Hanya mata yang punya hati yang luka mampu mengeluarkan air mata yang mampu menggoayahkan mata di hilir.

2010-04-19T22:10:00.002+08:00

Aku mendengar lagu KUPINJAM SATU BINTANG from Riz AF & ALyah....Teringat ngan Nini. Ku tak ingin berjauhan..Usah kau hampiri perpisahan. Ku berjanji sayang....Ku menunggu dikau PULANG ke Kuching Nini!!!!! hahahhaha!

they are my girls!

2010-04-19T21:52:00.002+08:00

Kenangan aku dan dia....

Tak akan aku lupa...sungguh..

Banyak perkara yang kami kongsi bersama...

Terasa pilu pabila perkara yang paling ditakuti...

Berlaku...seperti lagu yang sering aku dengar

Tiap pagi sebelum ke sekolah..

Sungguh sedih..tak tertanggung,,

Rela hidup tanpa teman lelaki..tak sanggup

Bersendirian tanpa kawan baik perempuan..

Sering berkongsi air mata,gelak tawa..

Sering berkongsi masalah,kejayaan

segala persengketan membawa keutuhan dalam persahabatan...

Dimanakah akan aku cari sekumpulan teman wanita yang hebat seperti mereka?

Dedicate to all my girls,,,,,,.....

khesah daku

2010-04-19T21:24:00.003+08:00

Pada suatu pagi yang hening,seperti biasa aku bangun dari tilam ku dan terus menuju ke toilet. Aku cuci muka aku dengan pembersih muka aku yang senantiasa bertukar dan memberus gigi dengan rentak yang rancak. Setelah itu,aku membersih tubuh aku dengan bahan-bahan yang sepatutnya. Sebaik selesai,aku terus menuju ke kamar dan memakai pakaian sekolah ku. Handphone senantiasa berada di samping aku. Buku-buku Tingkatan Enam aku telah ku susun rapi di dalam tas besar kepunyaan aku sebelum aku tidur. Mata aku masih kelat,aku sambung tidur hingga tiba masanya aku ke sekolah. Kelam kabut di waktu pagi sudah menjadi kebiasaan aku sebagai seorang pelajar Tingkatan Enam Atas. Masuk ke dalam kenderaan bapak aku yang sentiasa menjadi idaman kalbu sesetangah manusia kerana rim keta bapak aku sungguh menawan. (:

Memang tiap hari aku hampir lewat ke sekolah. Bukan lewat,on time! haha!! Aku sentiasa membaca buku dan nota-nota buatan sendiri dalam kereta sambil mendengar WAI.FM. Boleh tahan lagu Iban yahh...?? hehe!

Setibanya di pagar sekolah yang aku gelar GATE HOSPITAL,bapak aku sentiasa memberi kata-kata peransang agar aku dengan adik aku cemerlang dalam peperiksaan. Dua baris pengawas yang bertugas sentiasa menanti kedatangan aku..Seperti VVIP (: Pengawas sentiasa tegur aku yang tak berstoking..Sebenarnya aku bukan seperti itu. aku suka berstoking. Tapi entah mengapa tahun itu aku seperti tidak mahu berstoking. HAHA!!! Cikgu sentiasa tegur akan pakaian sekolah aku. Baju aku yang sudah pudar,nampak kekuningan,skirt aku yang aku sendiri designed dan hantar ke tailor,sungguh seksi! ala-ala pramugari gituu... hehe! dan kaki ku bogel. Kasut seperti tidak punya wang untuk membeli yang baru. Aku selesa menjadi selekeh! Alasan,asal otak pandai tak perlu kelihatan elok(ini prinsip aku,jangan ikut). Itu lah aku.

Belajar seperti seorang pelajar yang betul-betul menghayati erti " ILMU ADALAH PELITA HIDUP". Aku sentiasa meluanngkan masa belajar sendiri di perpustakaan sekolah dan kantin sekolah sehingga jam 6 petang paling maksimum. Selepas itu,di rumah..aku rehat.

Perjalanan hidup aku sebagai pelajar tingkatan enam memang banyak memberi kesan yang mendalam dan betul-betul mengajar aku menjadi seorang insan yang berguna. Aku menjadi lebih yakin. Segala penat lelah aku,akhirnya terbalas dengan keputusan yang baik! Hehehe..Aku sangkakan aku gagal kerana otak aku telah dirancuni dengan pelbagaia persepi bahawa STPM sangat sangat sukar dan pasti gagal. Tapi,tidak sebenanya! Dengan usaha yang gigih,fokus dan mengetahui tujuan memasuki Tingakatn enam dan mampu menghalang diri dari segala nafsu,akhirnyaberjaya. aku sungguh bangga kerana mampu merempuh STPM yang orang sering kata ianya SUKAR! Aku dan kawan-kawan aku yang lain membuktikan bahawa kami mampu! (:

Dulu aku diejek kerana masih menggunakan pakaian sekolah. Rakan-rakan yang lain sudah memakai pakaian formal yang segak. Kami masih terikat dengan perauturan sekolah. Perkara sedemikian tidak mudah mematahkan semangat. Akhirnya aku mampu,menewaskan mereka. Tak lama lagi aku akan seperti mereka,berpakaian formal........

2010-04-18T11:59:00.001+08:00

I wanna be a Jazz singer

ku bukan aku

2010-04-17T19:38:00.003+08:00

Family day supposed to be a happy day. For me it was not. Not saying that it was a dull event. It was a great event! for kids...haha! I woke up as early as 4.30 am just to get ready for our snacks. I had my dawn bath and cooked straight away in BATIK!! When things were done, i went to my room and got myself ready. At 6am we went straight to Santubong Beach Resort. Too bad, we did not bring our digital camera. My mum was using it for other purpose. By the way, she was not following us. She had something to do at Serian. Arrived earlier than others,biasala Malaysian Time...People were not arrive yet. We were so damn early! and my brother and i got a cosy place to sit. What a relief! hehe...we were sitting down,watching the Telekom families and laughing at silly silly stuff..However,it was a calm morning for me. The emcees were so damn funny! and i was glad that they were the one who made me and others laughing like hell! we got entertained.

Things went smoothly until i received a SMS from someone whom i concern less. She always make my head ache..hahha! but i knew her well enough. I made many excuses to her. She is a weird friend i ever met!

I wonder many stuff and it seemed never meet an end. I need a full stop man! These past few days my feelings were mixed. I had no idea what is going wrong with me.

Cannot wait to enter university. Finger crossed!!!

2010-04-05T22:00:00.001+08:00

I rather with someone who really care and appreciate me rather than i am with someone that i really really love. I know,eventually,i might losing that someone. Open a new heart for a brand new life.

buhai buhai....ako ang buhai

2010-04-03T14:31:00.003+08:00

It's been a long time i did not update my blog. My routines made me crazy. however,my three days holidays made me a human being again!!! I was like a robot for a week. I was busy with my work and my personal life. Many things went upside down. haha!!! But,i was happy with the people that i love.

Do i need to change in order to forget the past? That is the question that always play on my mind. I am afraid of many many things nowdays. even smallest thing can make me anxious easily. Many many stuff bugging me. It is so scary when things that we wanted to avoid so much getting us nearer and nearer each day. Hmmphh.. Am i that different from before? As i told my mother a few days ago,the SITUATION made me changed. But my laughter and my naughty naughty attitude still the same. Kinda a bit matured than before. Kinda slowly in love with my new life. Trying to adapt the new situation. Starting a new life.

Aku jatuh cinta apda dirimu..wahai new buhai! xD

miang

2010-03-20T08:44:00.002+08:00

Banyak kes curang curang. Kawan saya yang sudah kahwin punya satu anak,suami masih mencari yang lain. Bukan dia seorang,ramai lagi saya mendengar rintihan hati sang isteri didustai. Mendengar rintihan mereka membuatkan Ward menyuruh saya agar tidak berumah tangga. Hahaha!!! Isteri bertungkus lumus mencari nafkah untuk keluarga. Sang suami bersandiwara. Hati wanita memang hancur dan remuk. Hanya mendapat kekuatan daripada anak-anak mereka. Seperti yang saya pernah katakan pada Kak Selia yang sering menjadi tempat luahan saya,MULUT LINUT HATI KELADI.AKU JERAK.NDA AGIK PERCAYA.

my playlist song..random!

2010-03-19T09:03:00.003+08:00

Tired of bulak....

Sudah lah sayang,i don't believe you.Why am i with you? No wonder lah my friends pun tak suka you. so i guess that's the end of our story

(: Hardly to accept but i got a new bug! yeahh..!!!

Oohh Ohhh...Sooo..Ohhhh...Why are you so obessed with me?? Ohh..Boy,you are losing your mind..You are confused.You are wasting your time.

When i fall in love.....It will be forever...Or i'll never fall in love...ohhhh...
In the restless world..love is ended before it's begun and too many moonlight kisses (:

whine up!!

Hush hush!!! i never need you to be strong. I never need you for judgement. I never ask for help. I don't want you...say a single word,HUSH!! HUSHH!!

Ohhhh..I really wanna that thing i just want to sing i love you baby wont u bring all the flowers you find out in the garden. Don't tell me that your heart is harden. But you dont wnat me anymore how could it be? look what you have done to me..Ohhhh...

tidak ku duga ini akan terjadi.....

2010-03-18T09:45:00.003+08:00

Hati ini pernah disakiti. Oleh sebab itu,saya mempunyai satu fobia. Fobia itu dikenali sebagai "Commitment Phobia". But it will change soon. Tidak mahu mengenang kisah lama,campak ke dalam laut yang dalam. Biar ianya menjadi sejarah yang terulung dalam hidup. Sakit hati yang melampau akan memakan diri. Sanggup aku singirkan segala-galanya. I'll do anything for my own happiness. It's okay for me when i know the fact that things won't last forever. That's life. It has to be that way. And i thank myself for being strong with that 'current'.

Time flies so fast. And i know i have hope. and i able to smile again. I laugh the way i used to laugh. So happy and free to be back. Yehhu..! Oh ya,being in lovey dovey thingy make me smile. Sometimes,we need to accept some facts and i followed my instinct. If i find it's wrong with this person,i know what to do next. If i feel right,i'll go on and see what's next.

The part that i like being a girl is that,the surprises that are waiting for me. (:

Saree

2010-03-17T21:20:00.002+08:00

me in saree. This saree was designed by Nadiya and I. I wore it during Ponggal Nite at UNIMAS Kuching. It was a fun event. Never experienced it before. So, we enjoyed our night ;D

He is my HONEYBEE

2010-03-17T21:17:00.001+08:00

My honeybee is always be my honeybee.

Honeybee,why are u so sweet?

Honeybee,why are u damn strong and determined?

Honeybee,why are u so brave?

Honeybee,why can't i sleep soundly whenever u are not around?

Oh Honeybee...

I miss u honeybee

2010-03-13T00:43:00.002+08:00

I used to live in a 'make believe' relationship.

I do care less now and i know when the rain stops,the sun will appear.

sunny day makes life wonderful. when life is so wonderful,people tend to forget easily.

When the rainy day appears,blaming each other for not preparing the shelter make the true colour appears. And that's how i describe my relationships.

when i fall in love with u....

2010-03-10T09:45:00.001+08:00

Indonesia.. I cant wait....Indonesia, i really cant wait. Im falling in love with you. Really fall in love with you. (:

FRIENDS FOREVER

2010-03-10T09:43:00.001+08:00

Thanks to Nor Faizah for making this wonderful pic. I'll treasure all our moments together. Take care and God Bless my girls. Friends Forever. (:

2010-03-10T09:35:00.003+08:00

NO MORE " I'M SORRY,I LOVE YOU" I need prove. Baby boy...It's all in what you do. " I LOVE YOU" If it is true..Baby boy it's all in what you do.

Hardly for me. But,somehow,we might do not know that new love appear soon.

EVENING

2010-03-07T08:39:00.002+08:00

Tuhan bagi mata untuk melihat keindahannya..Indahnya dunia apabila hati mulai tenang. This is the first time i really see the world is so beautiful. My love and i were enjoying the evening breeze that day. And i could hear the wind was whispering to me. I could feel the calm. Happy day for a while and for a while,it was a worth time to spend.

2010-03-07T08:33:00.001+08:00

Kalau cinta jangan kacau..kalau sayang tak perlu marah..kalau ikhlas tak minta berbalas...

right?

2010-03-04T09:20:00.002+08:00

Things gone really wild these days. But most of these wild things made me smiled the whole day! I finally passed my STPM.I managed to enter university but i do not know which one yet. Hope to enter the best local university ever! *finger-crossed* Nadiya and I were so so happy with our results and to be honest we did not expect that much. But, i thank God for that. All my hardwork and scarifies really paid off. That's the first wildest thing that i had last week. It's been a week i got to know my STPM result. Hehehe! I cried in joy!

The second thing, i never thought that with my 'weird' attitude managed to bond a feeling that i am so afraid of. The way a guy who really likes me as he claimed " LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT" made me laught the whole day of my work. I never laught that much in my lonely 8 months. Haha! Obviously, he made me laugh which i like, honestly. But i am not ready for a new relationship. My aim for now is that i want to further my studies. I wanna go further,further as it could be. Hoping to be away from Malaysia. Really hope for that.

The third wildest thing,men gone mad when they didn't get what they want.

Mr A and Miss A

2010-02-21T01:00:00.002+08:00

He made me think,think and think. The Lord is testing me,testing me,and testing me. He makes me smile everyday. He makes my heart beats fast. He makes me alive after dying for many many months. He made me believe again. Believe in something that i almost forget. Am i worthy to have him? I guess,i am not. That is just a feeling that soon be forgotten.

melampau

2010-02-21T00:52:00.002+08:00

Kenapa manusia perlu ada dua identiti? Adakah mereka malu akan kebenaran di mana mereka bukan sesempurana sesorang itu? Kenapa perlu didustai sedangkan ada satu hubungan yang kukuh amat perlu di pertimbang rasakan? Kenapa harus berbaik-baik sedangkan dengan manusia yang sepatutunya,selaykanya menerima layanan itu,tidak diterima lansung? Tidak menghormati perasaan orang yang jauh lebih penting dan sebaliknya membuatkan aku berasa meluat tapi tak terdaya untuk berkata apa-apa. Manusia seperti ini,hanyalah manusia yang malu akan kebenaran yang hakiki dan sombong yang melampau. terlampau mementingkan diri sendiri. sampai bila pun,kewajaran untuk menghulurkan tangan pabila diperlukan memerlukan kudrat yang tiada kesudahan. lebih baik,tidah usah. pura-pura tidak melihat dan memahami. Begitu senang untuk menjadi jahat. Jahat demi 'survival'.

2010-02-08T00:46:00.003+08:00

Sometimes we met the wrong person just to make us more mature. There is blessing in disguise. Life is colourful and i do not want to abuse all the wonders that are given. I want to live as a person who deserve to be lived. Be like a butterfly. Looks tame and yet hardly to catch. I believe, things happened for reasons. It may not now we realise,it will waken us when we are into the deep deep holes. I must say life without God is like living in an empty glass. As i know who i am,who is my Creator, i pledge to myself not being friend with 'the sins'. I try my best. Months after months, i began to realise,it's better to shut up and keep it loud in my blog,i guess. People seem so beautiful at the outside and i was fooled by that and now i felt the pain. The cut is getting deep and deep. The deep cut makes me wonder and wiser. Learnt from previous experience.
, i began to know,there is none like our family members. The outside world is harsh. Do not say love when do not have the responsibilities,commitment,trust,hope,faith and the most important thing,RESPECT. If any of these none or lacking one, it is not love. I rather hug my heart tightly and i won't let anyone,anybody to touch and hurt it once more. Once is enough. The deepest cut will always be the deepest cut. It's hard for me to say that i am 100% forgive but i will humble myself and accept whatever happens. That is what should it be. It has written and live for the fullest.

saving for my hungry soul and it hurts me when others are crying because others got hurt by others. Be the most outstanding person in life. Men never be perfect. How hard they try not to fail,they will fail once. If they are never fail, they should never be men. (Antonia)

2010-02-04T13:29:00.002+08:00

I have been searching for that person. A year after that, i found that person. She has no difference from the previous ones. In my case, reminds me a lot of Tiger Wood case. I mean his scandal case. with the same trait, all the women that he slept with blonde hair,the same face features. Whenever i read about Wood's scandalous story, i personally feel sorry for his wife. I can imagine being cheated and for sure not every wife's wish to have a hubby having an affair. Not just having an affair..AFFAIRS. I wonder will Wood change? I guess, no. I never want to believe people change. They will change once they really hit by something.

As i work as a promoter at Parkson The Spring, i get to know the real world better and better. The real world is so harsh. When we are weak, we will get easily bullied. Not saying that i am perfect sometimes, i do not give a damn to people. I becoming more and more independent. For sure, just like what my good friend said to me once during our lunch break," There is no more true love in this world. The love only appear when the first moment they get to know each other for the first time". I understood and that was so deep and yet so true. That is why she said
" Dunia mahu kiamat"

Men becoming gays. women becoming lesbians. The reason why they turned their lives like that(most of the answers) because of betrayal from their previous relationships. Their ex partners cheated on them. I knew a gay and he told me that he never want to trust a woman in his life anymore. He said that " Semua perempuan racun". I felt sorry for him. He is the most good looking dude ever but he is a gay.

So, the conclusion is, think before we act.

yes,i remember

2010-01-18T16:33:00.002+08:00

I remember something and i do not want to repeat the same mistakes. It's up to me to write my own story life. Now days,i am more to myself. Not much interaction going on. People being so nice with me with hidden agendas. I have these thoughts that people are never be the 'people' that we want to be fitted in. Sometimes it's better to keep ourselves low or in other words,humble,down to earth. It is more about knowing the real you and the surrounding.

Met many kind of colours,make me knowing myself better. I am still searching the purpose of myself living in this world. Till now, i am not so sure what i really want. when i had something that i really really want to do, there is someone is trying his best to pull me down. to make me not worthy to live in. i decided to prove and at the same time,i am not going to make any close contact to that person. It's better for us to keep it to yourself. No use foe us to share something if we know that person is not the person that is willing to be with us. Simple as that.

Whatever we do,we face all the consequences and be more responsible. It is better to live in a normal and respected pace. Not saying that i got a halo on my head. It's a healthy and safer to live and fit in inside the community itself. Even though many people said to me, do not care what people have spoken to us. Sometimes,it does matter to me. Either it's building us up or pulling us down. we must know how to equalise it.

Today im off from my duty due to hard works these days. My feet are aching but im not complaining. It's the decision that i made. I do not want to regret as i know that will bring the best benefit ever in my life to have a work experience and building up my confidence to talk to people i mean costumer as a promoter. i met wonderful customer and not all.. Some of them are very fussy. Never know. I thought i am the most fussy person. Guess, i am wrong about that.

what a day off..

the force

2010-01-09T13:50:00.002+08:00

Foce makes us in tense

Force makes us moody

Force makes us have the second thoughts

Force makes us understand the situation more

Force makes us know the true colour

Force makes us run and stop

Force makes us ego

Force makes us cunning but not wise enough

Force makes the love be the victim

2010

2010-01-03T14:53:00.002+08:00

happy New Year to me!!!

*the new leaf*

2009 gave me an eye opener.

Thank the Lord for making me stronger and wiser.

Not wiser enough but a bit wiser.

Battle of emotions almost made me drowning.

Thank God i am still alive and survived.

Friends come and go.

which i expected since the beginning.

Only those love me know me well.

Be more careful with snaky tongue

Be more adventurous than ever

In this 2010.

My Christmas

2009-12-27T22:17:00.002+08:00

This year Christmas was the usual Christmas that my family and I had. We just celebrated it in moderation. What made this year Christmas was a very interesting event was my mum and i were baking some cakes and I managed to see Bandar Sri Aman after many many years of not visiting that place. I was in a happy mood and of cause i was very very tired.

Seeing Bandar Sri Aman again made me 'benge' of the old memories with my late Aki( Grandfather). We used to 'lepak' at pasar Simanggang when i was a little kid. It was pleasant memories of a granddaughter to her late grandfather.

Noting much i can write bout my Christmas. We went to church for the Christmas mass. The mass was wonderful with the great choirs conducted by Mr Benedict. They sang like angles! In literally. I love my Christmas this year..but last year was the BEST! xD I wish i can celebrate Christmas in Jakarta and wishing in Blok M that day.. I love to shop....aawwwwwcchhh!

Here it goes,again.. Nightmare comes

2009-12-22T11:53:00.002+08:00

I woke up in the morning with a great feeling. I woke up very early than my usual days. I woke up early because of my aunty.We had breakfast together. We went to Golden Arc to taste the most popular Laksa Sarawak. The flavour was great! The Laksa there is completely different than the others. The soup is very very creamy..and i like the big and fresh prawns. It is a worth to spend.

Before i had my breakfast, i had the most shocking moment ever! The beat fast heart made my body almost trembling to the ground. I do always don't want to know anymore about that person. I wanted so bad to run away from that person. I really do. I wished i never know that person and i am completely forgave him/her. What i want is i do not want to have any personal or in thing with that person. I am so happy and so peaceful not to have that person around. Maybe we need to move our won separate way. I don't want to be so 'itok' with that person. i want to have a new life here. I am so tired thinking of that person. My brain is running out the juice. I am happy with my life. It's just that it is so difficult for me to say NO! HuhU!

YES

2009-12-19T10:47:00.003+08:00

YES,I AM SOmbong..So what????

That's what i told my mother just now.HAHA! It's due to when my mother asking me about
a girl that used to be my bestie when i was a lil kid. Well..I must say as we grow older and moved alot,we tend to change. I didn't know about that actually. maybe the lifestyle that we had made someone change completely. I tried to talk to her last Gawai. I tried to open as many topics as i could.Only poco-poco could make us talk again but it only lasted for few minutes. It's like one night conversation. I didn't mind actually cause we had not meet so many many years. She has her own life so do i. We did spend time together when we were kiddos. I came to her house. We played. We went to Sunday school together. Basically she was a good friend of mine when i firstly moved back to Kuching after five years staying in Miri. We did many stuff and had fun together until she transferred to Batu 10. since then, i only meet her during festive season.Either it's Gawai or Christmas.

Christmas is around the corner. I admit i only have 55% of Christmas spirit. HAHA! The shopping not yet been done. The tree still in the box and yeah,to be honest i really miss Jakarta so much..So,i'll update soon.

i ♥ durian

2009-12-17T11:01:00.002+08:00

I am so in love with Durian

I got sore throat because of Durian.
I got fever because of Durian.
I am so addicted to its flavour(OMG!)

thinking of 'you'

2009-12-17T10:49:00.002+08:00

thinking of 'you' is referring to my thought of getting a job.
Recently,my problem is dealing with the 'getting-heavier' responsibilities. Well,bingung punyabinggung,My Lord helped me last night. He sent Pete and told me that he had job for me. I was so happy. Finally i got something to do next month while waiting for my GSTT(Guru SandaranTidak Terlatih). O only work for few weeks only and the pay is very very REASONABLE! So, i did ask few of my girls and Hen accepted. So, we just wait for Pete's call. HaHA! yay...my first time working..huahua! xD I will update soon regarding to this topic. Hehehe!

kinda busy with the house chores and watching great dramas from ASTRO. I love television so much and yeah..i got a new hobby. It's a very addictive hobby. I am so addicted towards computer games. I mean online games. Oh...i could spend many many hours in front of the PC. i guess everyone had this experience. I love the feeling of addiction. It makes me full of excitement and of course the cons are becoming FAT,lazy and tired. HAHA!

Happy Thursday everyone

SONG of THE DAY

2009-12-13T01:55:00.003+08:00

I felt attached to this song. I like the lyrics. Not like,LOVE IT! It's about...Givin' up on someone. Truly amazing the beat.

It's What You Do by Chrisette Michele

The chorus blew me away. I am so close with these verses.

: No more "im sorry"," i love you"

i need proof

Baby boy,it's all in what you do

" I love you",if it's true

Baby boy,it's all in what you do :

unchained memories of my senior year

2009-12-13T01:43:00.009+08:00

to do or not to do..

2009-12-13T01:14:00.002+08:00

STPM is over and the holidays seem never end..Like what one of my ex-classmate,Chai Teck Hua told me before. There are some problems that are bugging me these days. WHAT AM I GOING TO DO DURING THE HOLIDAYS? I kept on searching for a clue for my answer. Well,it did. It's very simple. GO AND WORK. I need CASH badly. I am willing to do anything to fill up my time and cash but wont do something that might 'killing my entire life'. So,i began with searching for vacancies in the newspaper. There are plenty of jobs that 'ngena' with me according to their criteria that they want. Let's name a few. waitress,nanny,tuition teacher...etc.Hmph...What a hard decision to make.

Initially,i wanted to be a temporary teacher but i just do not know HOW. i did ask a few about that but macam takda yang mahu tolong. So,i made myself a backup plan. I barely close my eyes and i am thinking myself becoming a radio DJ. HAHA! Maybe I'll go for that if i have given the opportunity. Oh..I need cash. Please....

The moment i left SMK Green Road(my school), i felt that the REAL WORLD is waiting for me outside the SCHOOL GATE. I was hesitated to that direction. Not saying that i am afraid. It's just that my life as ANTONIA is very cosy and i am not so used in that environment i must say. I wanted to do something different just like my other friends do. Guess, I'll give myself a shot and who knows,i am okay. Hehehe!

it is been a while

2009-12-10T01:18:00.003+08:00

******

Whoa..It's been a while people. I got myself very busy and yeah,barely update myself. So far,the life is about preparing or guarding myself well equipped for the battle of the year,STPM. My life is so simple,for now. Having the simplest ingredients. No sparks no new things.

SAY NO TO ROKOK !!!

2009-10-21T15:29:00.005+08:00

It is a funny thing when things are slowly to change and what more to say things are changed completely, even funnier. School was fun today due to non stop 'healthy' conversation with the girls. We were talking about SMOKERs. It was a funny thing for us to talk that topic ,well...it helps in our essays. HAHA!

Based on personal experience smokers are tend to refuse to stop once they are into it. They are afraid to change,i guess or afraid to fall into their never ending addiction again or no one there to support them. I do not know whatever the reason is but i bet the smokers know the consequences of their unhealthy lifestyle. They are so addicted with the 'wrapped tar' and synonym with the greatest 'KOPI KAW" just to satisfy their needs. Their needs of what?? I haven't got a clue. I seen many men,especially involved in this unhealthy lifestyle.From my family members,friends to my own driving tutors. Sad as it may,that's the forever trend.

The Government is trying so hard to make the society realise the effects of smoking. Such as two minutes of advertisements(for me,it should be effective) and putting up 'scary-effects-on-human-body' posters. There are several effects that the smokers themselves aware with but as i said earlier,ROKOK comes first.

I saw someone whom i know ever since took out the cigarette from the box because he was so AFRAID to look at the mini poster on the box whenever he wanted to smoke. It's funny though as he did not want to accept the fact. This is one of the government's step to prevent the smoker to smoke frequently. I guess it takes time and it really showed that 'someone' is developing to stop from smoking. Hope soo...I have story to tell.

SMOKING IS VERY VERY BAD. THE NEVER ENDING ADDICTION leads to never happy ending

My late grandfather was a very heavy smoker and he died because of lung cancer. My Uncle Frankie used to be a heavy smoker and stopped completely when he married a nurse,my aunt. My dad, he never be and hates SMOKERS so much. That's why my dad 'awet muda'. My dad hates smokers badly.Who never does. Luckily my dad is not the one. I used to have an uncle whom to be my father's youngest brother stayed with us. Now he is working at Sri Aman. When he was around he gave a bad environment to us especially my youngest brother. He's still a kid and of course he was very curious whenever he saw my uncle smoked.

My dad constantly reminded him not to smoke inside the house,well,he never listened. it did affect my health. I was very very weak whenever he started to smoke inside his room. Thank God that our house wasn't air conditioned. I got fever and flu almost everyday. My dad as usual 'po pet po pet' at my uncle to stop smoking. It's like my father never ends his mission to stop people from smoking. Since my late grandfather was alive. I got bored actually. Smoking is very very bad. The never ending addiction leads to never happy ending. Smoking is not love. It damages our lungs and loved ones.Do not love to smoke.

Now,the house is so clean. Fresh air is not afraid to enter our house. No more smoke and no more constant flu.

So,say TAK NAK to ROKOK.

*****

2009-10-20T14:26:00.002+08:00

Tak dapat tolerate dengan:

manusia yang tak pandai makan ulam

manusia yang tak pandai makan tempoyak dan durian

manusia yang tak pandai makan cencaluk

manusia yang sentiasa mengambil kesempatan di dalam kesempitan

manusia yang menghina sesama manusia

manusia yang sentiasa betul walhal tidak

manusia yang menabur janji janji manis

manusia yang tidak menghormati orang lain

manusia yang hanya mengejar duniawi

manusia yang alpa akan kewujudan Tuhan.

*****

Ini merupakan rekaan dan luahan isi hati saya. Sekiranya ada yang tersingung,harap diampun. Sememangnya manusia tidak pernah sempurna. Berasa rendah hati lah pada Tuhan dan sentiasalah takut akan dosa dan kuasa Tuhan.

Another Flower

2009-10-15T16:34:00.002+08:00

Roy sounds so playboy....Antonia sounds so antoniaous..HAHAHA!!!

There was food leftover on the desk.
A cold coffee was under the chair.
Her hair clip was on his chest.
His cap was on her head.
She sang when she was on shower.
He listened and sang along with her.
She shouted whenever he made surprises for her.
Her smile, the biggest smile ever.
He never want to forget her smile.
He left her for another flower.
She ran and promised never want to look for another lover.

This is kinda a random thing that i post for today. Feel wanna post something like this.

Tinggalkan aku Mister.!

2009-10-13T14:54:00.005+08:00

Mister Kopi mencari aku tiap-tiap awal pagi.Aku buat bodoh sebab beliau sering menyakitkan hati aku. Dahlah pahit..bagi aku pening kepala.Aku beralih kepada Encik Milo. Encik Milo memang sudah manis so dia bukan berbibirkan gula. Tak perlu letak gula. Karakter beliau yang agak pekat sudah berjaya menambat hati aku. Aku lebih suka kalau Encik Milo peluk aku tika aku kesejukan. Memang lebih memahami daripada Mister Kopi.

*************

Mister Kopi sudah bosan dengan aku. Diam seribu bahasa. Aku hanya menjeling tajam dan memberi senyuman sinis. Cik Susu pula mulai menggoda Mister Kopi. Mister Kopi mulanya tolak tetapi akur tatkala Cik Creamer lari dengan Encik Kopi Tongkat Ali. Aku rasa Encik Air Mineral kesepian dan merasakan dipergunakan oleh aku terutamanya. Aku sentiasa ingat akan Encik Mineral. Hanya aku yang mampu membuat langkah pertama. Mister Kopi dengan Cik Gula.Betapa gembiranya aku pabila mendengar khabar yang mereka akan menimang cahaya mata baru. Encik Teh sedang mencari pasangannya. Tapi malang hanya kaum Adam saja meminati beliau..HAHA! Kesian dikau Teh.

semanis dan romantik
bagaikan STRAWBERRY & COKELAT =)

lafazkan janjimu wahai hidup aku

keriangan berlagu

asmara pun bertemu

antara aku dengan Milo (HAHA)

Kau satu-satunya aku mahu

seandainya pertemuan ini hanya mimpi..

oh jangan

semanis & romantik

2009-10-13T14:48:00.002+08:00

Hari sekolah aku macam biasa. Tiada yang menarik cuma aku mendengar khabar daripada mamat Hindustan yang aku agak tak payah aku nak ketahui sangat. =)

Hari ini memang hari ceria bagi aku.I don't know why. Mungkin lepas aku tengok wedding pictures. Mula lah aku nak berangan and yang bagi aku betul betul happy was i found that song yang aku mati matian nak cari..HAHA!!! Ke Awangan by Pinky(Zhana AF5) memang best giler.... finally =)

Esok ujian...aduh...Lemah dan lemas.

hello..selamat berjumpa

2009-10-07T14:03:00.002+08:00

Thanks to someone that i really sayang for giving me that song. Memang best giler that song. Kimia from Melda Ahmad. =) I enjoy.

~~xoxo~~

2009-10-07T05:57:00.002+08:00

Sometimes we tell others or own self that we could understand some situations. We wish that we wanted to understand something beyond our ability. I used to be like that. It made me panicked a lot. I worried too much just like someone ever told me and to be honest i forgot who told me that. Memory kinda not so in stable right now. Somethings we need to let go due to some reasons. Not being so sentimental here but it happen to me right now. I have no one to talk to,no one to listen so on. Everyone is so busy. Busy with their world plus the examination year makes everyone strives for their success.

School days always bring good memories to me. bitter sweet memories. This year in my school it's like the most dull year ever! HAHA! I am so sorry for saying this. The early year was GREAT but towards the end..it's like cemetery! So serene plus we are the zombies. HAHA! I do admit everyone has personal problems and they come to school just to be free from all the burdens by meeting friends. Now for me home and school is the same. The teachers cannot teach if the students are less than the usual. Make my days dull,again. I feel so torture inside.
I am not whining up all the things happen here. Like i said earlier i have no one to talk to. =)

I am going to get myself ready for MUET SPEAKING TEST. Today is the day. Hope i can make it. I'll post again if i have something interesting to share. School is the only place that makes me feel better after i jailed myself in my own home. HAHA!

2009-10-06T08:05:00.002+08:00

Sometimes i do forget the feel being lazy,being hard working,in love,being loved,being missed, and being so alert with the hussles. I just do not know why i wanted to think that i am being alone for the first time. I know. I always the happy go lucky one. These days i am not maybe not one anymore. It's time to be serious. Hope not so serious. How i wish i wasn't make any tempting decisons but well..it went smoothly eventhough it was a lil bit rocky.

Seriously,i do hard think about my past last night and i couldn't figure any of them. In other words i barely had clear pictures of my past. But what i know,the feels were happy and sad. Each person that ever closed to me and the realtionship is the end (friendship..etc..) it made me sad.Very sad. Sometimes i need to move on by end up the relationship.

I wish when the happiest moment ever in life,i could take the picture and made it the only picture ever. I do not want other pictures. I wanted to use that only picture to be my only weapon when i am down.

I do smile and laugh a lot all the time but there is something in me is missing. I do not know what is it. I guess i got years to figure it out.

bitter heart..oohh bitter heart....my bitter heart

you are...the darlings

2009-10-04T21:16:00.003+08:00

Guess my world is no longer the most beautiful as i ever claimed that to myself. Pretty sad that as i am getting older i get to know more than ever. To be honest sometimes i do like it and at times i am freaking scared that knowing myself growing older. Many things revolved around me today. Why these days i saw many people were so gay and i kept telling myself that i was not. Happy are those who really know the meaning of true happiness. What does my future tells me if i am still living at my past? I bet i might be a crazy banshee. HAHA!!

I guess i get myself too emotional due to stress that i myself do not know what's the real cause. I want to achieve something that no one can debate the fact that i am better than them. I wish i can see what will happen in the next few months. Might be dating cute dude? Naah...wish no more at the moment.

I want to spend lots of my youth with most enjoying moment ever by not destroying my might life. I love my youth. Before i am getting really old and might be chosen marriage or being single is the next doing thing,i want to try lots of thing. Kinda overcome some of my cureable phobias. Such as i am afraid of height.

I am enjoying listening to Paramore's song. The Only exception. It's a very nice song and for the first time i really fell in love with lyrics. Thanks to my brother who promoted me that song.

HAPPY SATURDAY EVENING

2009-10-03T23:50:00.002+08:00

(lil,ant,nisa)

broken hearted,won't let it happen again.

2009-10-03T22:59:00.003+08:00

I am having a guilty feeling in me since a few weeks ago. I knew i couldn't get over it but it's a good thing to do. This evening Nisa and Liyana brought me to The Spring. It's been a month i didn't step my feet on that shinny marble floor. I never like going to The Spring. Berat rasa hati want to make myself enter that the biggest shopping centre in Kuching. My mind was drifting to another place and it got distracted when i saw few good looking lads. Took my breath away.I can't be a good and loyal GF..That's what i told my girls..hehehe!!!

I was so emotional when i got a shocking news. I never knew that someone that i ever fell has someone. It took me four hours to figure it out and accepting the truth. Well, i came to a conclusion. Not being so bitchy here...i must get him..hahhaha!!! Besides he is with someone that doesn't suite him,that was Nisa told me. and i must say..i might not get him at all. I am tired of waiting and do not believe in long distanced relationship anymore(previous was terrible). So,decided to..bye bye him. Letting go on something and pretending that was not happening at all really made a goodnight sleep. I may sound cynical but that's the fact if someone is like ME. Yeah..still...Mandy told me..the past is always haunting.I try my best to minimise the mistakes that i ever did and stay focus.

I was at the MBO and saw a beautiful couple. They weren't that perfect but they were so happy. I was like them,before. And immediately i felt sad. I wish i had it right now. Being single at this moment i have a less burden. =) able to get to know myself more. Happy as it seems there is something that make me wonder. Does thing happened for a reason? I mean a better one.

The Spring is the place where i can see many sorts of people. I tend to flirt and sadly all the cute ones were taken. Left me alone sitting at the corner sipping a hot coffee. I always laugh at myself when i was trying so hard to make myself satisfy. Trust me,,it did. Made me smile the whole weekend. =)

Passing with flying colours in my STPM is the major thing and a battle need to be won. I get myself motivated by visualising myself jumping happily holding my STPM result's slip. Break a leg Antonia! =)

the love of mine,next

2009-09-30T19:30:00.003+08:00

Cinta Sempurna and Deeper Conversation sung by Yuna. These songs inspired me a lot. I would like to play these songs with a grand piano..Need to sharpen my skill..It's been a long time i didn't play the piano. I miss the piano so much...hurrmm...I have to let go that interest of mine due to other life's commitment..Sadly...need to let go.Cannot afford to buy a keyboard! Oh my love..i need to forget about you for a while..

aku serba tiada..aku kekurangan.

lepaskan diriku kerna aku tak mampu menanggung sebuah cinta sempurna darimu.....

kan aku tak pernah mengerti dirimu...

hilangkanlah rasa itu...

aku hilang dari kewujudan..

mellow saturday!

2009-09-19T11:23:00.002+08:00

Waking up as usual..Saturday morning is always the most boring morning. My father offs for work..my mum busy with her laundry.My brothers always at their schools..extra activities.Left me alone...Unbathed.I sat down in front of the big screen and watched all the channels that i had watched several times. Off to the kitchen sipped a cup of coffee and overheard my neighbour's conversation that what i loved to do every Saturday morning. My mum would spend her timeless moment in the bathroom. My dad would be back almost evening. I don't have the study mood every Saturday. I wish i had a car. I might be somewhere in town..and definitely ALONE. I prefer going alone. Oh Saturday..why the day is so dull.I made myself busy by FACEBOOK-ing,DOING my last minute revision and of course..talking to myself..heck! HAHA!

Saturday..U should be great! I used to have great Saturdays..But why my Saturdays seem so dull? Mellow Saturday. Guess...im lonely and yah..the books are calling me to accompany them.Soon,i'll ditch them as i ditched someone who made my world so blue. I can't wait for Sunday.

Bye Saturday,Hello Sunday!

she sings my life

2009-09-15T14:49:00.003+08:00

these lines attracted me whenever i listen KNOCK YOU DOWN by Keri Hilson.

"Say you gotta take the good,the bad,happy and the sad

But when you bring a better future than I had in the past

Cause I dont wanna make the same mistakes I did

I don't wanna fall back on my face again

I'll admit it, I was scared to answer love's call

And if it hits better amke it worth the first when it comes around"

2009-09-15T14:44:00.002+08:00

IF YOU DO NOT KNOW WHAT TO DO,JUST do not do ANYTHING

from THE WOMEN movie